Logs:Conflicting Needs

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Cast

Vorpal, Teagan, Laura

Setting

The Direct Action house

Log

They open the door to the house, leading everyone inside, and pause just inside the door. "I'm going to get some mead. June's got a new batch." Teagan scratches their cheek awkwardly, and turns to look at Laura, "And then before we talk about the good stuff with Sigrun, let's talk about -- what just happened. And how it's landing on Johnny." Whatever that means. Teagan shucks off their coat and hangs it just inside the door, unlinks their necklaces from the back of their neck, shoves them into the pocket of the coat, and shucks off their boots. Yeah, that leaves them topless, but they're actually distracted enough that this fact doesn't really -- register. They unbelt Baby, too, and carry her over to set her on the end table before going to gather mead from the fridge.

Laura blinks, then nods, ears lowering and hands clasping as the large woman seems to withdraw into herself, gaze on the ground. She'd normally stare at Teagan right now, flirt, but that's currently a long way from her thoughts.

Johnny's shadows pause mid-motion, partway through helping him out of his coat and boots, shifting to look at each other like they all of them just got caught in the middle of something. Vorpal himself catches Laura's reaction and he winces hard. "Teagan, dear heart, I don't- think this is a great idea. Laura's already wilting and that was exactly what I was trying to avoid. Are you sure about this?" One of his hands goes up and rakes through his hair, shoving it off his forehead.

"Well, if I wasn't before, I am now," answers the Mirrorskin, gathering mead and settling on the couch. They lean back, then, for a moment after the bottles are set on the table. "Because if this is ever going to work, I can't have one of you flinching and then the other one wilting when I bring up the reactions that are happening. We have to be able to talk about stuff, and bring our confusion and potential misreads to the table, or it's all going to explode."

Teagan leans forward, resting their forearms on their knees. "I have three bottles of mead, two of which are mine and Johnny may not have any of them. The third one is for Laura. Can you both please come sit with me and let's talk about this shit first and then Laura can tell us good things about Sigrun? There's an old saying that you should eat a live frog first thing every day, because then no matter what happens you have always done the worst thing first. So let's do the worst thing first, and then do the better things. Plus, my tits are out. What can be so bad about the world when my tits are out?"

She nods meekly, stepping forward and slipping into a chair before she takes a swig of a lot of mead. "I can't read him Teagan." She states after a moment, claws tapping against the bottle. She glances at Jack to include him. "You are.. the others. I -get-." She admits. "And your tits being out are always good.." She mutters lightly, in an effort to follow Teagan's teasing. "So, Jack. What did I miss? Because, I don't know, and, I need to. Please?"

Johnny's shadows get back to work, hang his coat and set his shoes aside, and then he walks over to the couch and folds down where he stands in that impossible, liquid manner to sit on the floor. He doesn't go for the mead just yet but he nods to Teagan, acknowledging the step taken to ensure he can snag one- and smirking faintly when they talk about their boobs. Fair enough.

"So... I used to be a walking weapon. Like, I know I'm dangerous as hell now, but I didn't use to carry knives, I used to be one. And when your fingers are capable of cutting through tanks-" That's not an exaggeration. He did that, once. "-you get used to keeping your dangerous bits sheathed so they don't hurt when you're not trying to do hurt."

"That's probably why I'm hard to read. When I'm carrying around stuff I think will hurt people, I find ways to avoid that. Talking about other topics, thinking about other stuff, reacting to something else so I don't have to try to not react to what's stuck in my craw. Like... for instance..." He glances at Teagan, but Teagan is better at all this than he is, and he takes them at their word.

"Like feeling backed into a corner every time you talk about Home and Family."

The Torrent reaches up and drags his hand down his jaw. "I'm- stuck in this intersection. On the one hand, I am the last person ever to tell someone who is or isn't their family. Family is Family and you don't need outside permission to care for someone and be close to them."

He's quiet for a moment. In the context of his previous metaphor, this must feel like unsheathing a lot of dangerous shit, and he's trying real hard not to let it slash anybody.

"But on the other hand, that's how I'm left feeling. Like- because I don't want to tell someone who is and isn't their family, I'm left feeling like my only options are either silence or accepting you as part of the family on the spot, and- I'm really sorry, but I'm not there yet. I'm not at no, and I'm not any closer to no, but I'm not at yes, yet, and as much as I've been reassured that I've got the time to figure out how I feel, every time I hear you call my family yours, or my home yours, it feels like it doesn't matter what I decide at the end of it because they're already yours, everyone else already accepted you, and my only options are to either pull the biggest dick move I can think of and tell you who is and isn't your family- or, because I can't even fathom doing that to somebody, cede my choice entirely and just give everybody else what they want."

There's nothing in the Mirror but patience and reflection, and -- when they extend an arm out toward Hyena, specifically, when Johnny is talking -- safety. For both of their loves. Johnny comes over and sits on the floor, and Teagan leans forward to gently run their fingers through his hair, and then -- for whatever reason -- briefly place their palm over his heart.

And then they sit back, and gesture for Laura to join them on the couch, their arms open. They have the unenviable privilege of knowing both sides of this situation way better than they can put into words.

She wordlessly pads over to sink into the couch next to Teagan, grasping their hand tightly and curving legs up and under herself as she settles down against the Mirrorskin, slowly widening eyes on Jack as he speaks. She's silent a long moment after he finishes, before her eyes narrow and her voice becomes more guttural. "And if you were in my fucking place, Jack? If everyone you loved was here, if this was home? And if all that could be taken away on a single word by one person? This is where I feel I belong. This is where I'm fucking happy, where I'm not just a fucking killing machine.

You don't let me in. I want to know you, understand you, because you're motley to them. Because you're part of the family. But how can I fucking do that when I can't get close to you? Am I supposed to pretend I don't fucking love Teagan, and Sigrun, and Glitch and June?" She growls quietly. "I can't. I won't. Even if I have to leave, I'll still love them all. You don't need to love me, that takes times to figure out, but, if you won't even.. communicate with me? You've the power to make me walk out that door on a single damned word."

A long, slow breath out, and Teagan holds tighter on to Laura's hand, interceding a bit with, "We're talking, Laura. Please, don't Summer this."

She glances at Teagan, nodding with a duck of her head and slowly exhaling to bring her temper under control. "Sorry.." She mutters quietly.

Vorpal turns up one corner of his mouth faintly as Teagan does their best to settle him before and after he speaks. It's not a smile but it's close. After that, though...

It's easy to tell when Johnny bristles. It's visible- but not furry hackles. It's the slow turn of a half-dozen forms in silhouette facing Laura and staring as she opens fire. His jaw shifts minutely as he sucks his teeth, reminding himself that he sat on the floor to leave everyone else in the room in a more comfortable position than himself. The faint gleam of his eyes in shadow turn towards Teagan wordlessly, and then back to Laura as she apologizes. It takes a moment, but the shadows drift out of synch and return to disparate poses behind him. Another moment while he rearranges his words to keep the sharpest edges turned away before he speaks. Before, he sounded reluctant to lay out his discomfort. Now, the story about being a weapon seems all the more plausible- there's steel in his words, if not edges.

"Don't treat me like a gatekeep. I just got done explaining the lengths I've been going through to insulate you from feeling like you're going to lose everyone you love. I mean," he states, still as the grave except for his speaking. "Even if I decided we'd never work, I'd never send you away and it's insulting that you think I would. I don't mind you being here. I dont mind you loving them or vice versa. I wouldn't- exile you because we didnt click, that's fucked."

"But you aren't entitled to me. You don't get to bristle and growl and swear because I haven't gotten comfortable with you yet or because I've still got walls up. I'm not an obstacle to overcome or quarry to run down or the key to keeping your family. I'm just... me."

"That's.." She nods slowly. "It's part of the problem Jack." She concludes, voice quieter now. "You're you. Not that obstacle or quarry. You have the final say to me joining, which is why, I'm struggling to handle this. Because I want to win you over, but, you're right. That should be about you, not about me joining the motley. I want to get to know you as, you. Not because I want to join, but, it's getting all tangled up from me." She laughs weakly. "I don't even know if I'm making sense now."

The Mirrorskin doesn't say an awful lot; they just stay out of the way of most of the conversation, letting the pair of them work things out. It's not unnatural for people to bristle at each other when the topic of conversation matters, after all.

"I mean, to be fair, she gets to. But at the same time, you get to have bad reactions to that, which is what we're talking about, kinda? People are entitled to their feelings and their reactions, even if they're inconvenient. They just have to live with the responses that other people have to those feelings and reactions."

They shrug vaguely, and when Laura speaks, they lean to kiss the top of her head. Reassurance. Complicated shit all tangled.

"... okay, yeah, fair. You know what I meant," mutters Vorpal as Teagan quite rightly clarifies who gets to do what.

"It makes sense. Just- try to remember you stand to lose nothing. You keep your relationships. You keep everything you have right now. Stop looking at it as if you're poised to lose something and everything will play out better. You're not risking anything- just finding out if you get to gain more."

He takes a deep breath. "I'm tired. I'm not mad, and like I said, not any closer to no. But I need to get some sleep or else I'm gonna pass out and drool into the carpet til Glitch gets up to eat frosted flakes and play god on animal island."

She nods slowly at Jack. "Thank you." A glance between him and Teagan. "Do you want, well, company? Just to share warmth, nothing else." She clarifies. "Sometimes it's good to not sleep alone."

"I did, but words are important, so I'm saying them." Teagan leans down to kiss Vorpal at the corner of his mouth, small and gentle. "Sleep is important, and we don't want you waking up to the endless loop music of Animal Crossing. Do you want company? I'm pretty fucking tired."

"Company sounds fine. I'm gonna just pass TF out so whatever makes everyone happiest." Cuz VorpalPlayer is exhausted too.