Logs:Supernal Foreshadowing Intensifies

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Content Warning

Alcohol consumption

Cast
Setting

Rainbow Road Bar

Log

Bars are good for two things in Mei's world: finding people she needs to talk to for a case, or drinking. Or karaoke, depending on the bar, so sometimes three things, although usually the third one involves a lot of the first one, too.

When Mei pulls up to the bar in Rainbow Road it seems to be the first option that she has in mind, since she orders a whiskey sour and pulls up a seat at the bar without doing much in the way of looking around for familiar faces, or searching for quarry.

Aaron's mid week routine is a weird one. Once you've got your service for Friday sorted out, you're basically just keeping busy. Conquer it by Wednesday afternoon and you can get a night off. So Aaron, dressed in a casual shirt and jeans, shuffles on in through the door, thumbing through his smart phone like someone who is feeling guilty about taking the night off. Maybe there's a message. Maybe someone needs him! But no. He's stuck with the monumental horror of the self for the night. Which is how he winds up seated next to Mei at the bar. "Well, hey there."

Mei, who was slouching a little bit and looking lost in her thoughts while she nursed her drink, looks up when she hears a voice beside her, before she has actually registered who it belongs to. When she realizes it's Aaron she sits up a little straighter and gives her drink a guilty glance, even though it's her first one and she hasn't actually done anything wrong. "Hey," she says, after taking a moment to sort her thoughts. "I didn't expect to run into you here," she adds. Obviously. Since she was surprised to see him.

"I don't get out much, it's true, but when I do it's usually to some place in the Gayborhood," Aaron remarks of his presence at the bar. "I actually started dating again. It's nothing serious yet, we're taking it slow. They kept flirting with me until I realized they actually meant me, and so. Yeah. I am no longer entirely my work now. It's pretty wild." He orders himself up a cider when the bartender stops by. Something good to sip.

A few things make brief appearances on Mei's face in sequence, as she goes on a quick face journey. A smile, a wince, a hint of understanding, another smile, but subdued. "That's great," she says, both genuine and lacking in enthusiasm. "There's nothing at all wrong with taking it slow, right? I'm not surprised someone was serious when they were flirting with you, for what it's worth. I'm sure for someone who is interested in men and who definitely doesn't think of you more like a father figure than a potential date, you're quite the catch." For the most part that last seems to be an attempt at humor, but her heart doesn't really seem to be in it and she takes another long drink. "Tell me a little about them?"

Aaron tilts his head a bit to the side, trying to figure out how to encapsulate the individual in question in more than surface details. "They're an artist. Very passionate about their work. They're an activist-- that's actually how we met, back during Never Again Is Now and the protests at the ICE facility. They're nonbinary. Ridiculously pretty, too. At least to me, anyway. Very kind and patient. Gifted with seemingly inexhaustable curiosity and tolerance. No. Acceptance. They're also a lot younger than I am, and they're not Jewish. So we're sort of navigating through that. I've never dated a goy before."

"They sound great," Mei says, after listening to interest to the way Aaron describes the person they've been dating, who Mei actually happens to have met, but doesn't know Aaron is talking about. "They sound like someone you'd date, too. I'm not even exactly sure what I mean by that, but the description you're giving me seems to fit." With a wry smile she says, "I've never actually dated someone who wasn't a goy. Not that I date much to begin with." And then she downs the rest of her drink in a gulp.

"I'm desperate for tips, in that case. It's funny, because I give advice on interfaith marriages all the time. But they're either agnostic or simply atheist in their beliefs. They're supportive of my faith, very curious and interested in what I do. And I'm pretty sure they'd be supportive of me keeping a Jewish home if we ever wound up cohabitating and the like. But I take a lot of things for granted in being understood through a Jewish mindset. If you could suggest potential pitfalls I might run into, that would be wonderful." Aaron takes a sip from his drink and leans onto the bar, watching Mei with interest. The teacher is now the student.

"You want dating advice? From me?" Mei asks, more than a little dumbstruck by the fact that anyone in the world would want her to give guidance on dating. She signals to the bartender for another drink and then turns back to Aaron. "I... just fell back out of a relationship, actually," she says. "I'm not any good at the dating thing, and if you ask me for advice it might be a good idea to take it as a list of things you shouldn't do. Maybe I need to make sure I date someone Jewish next time."

Aaron looks genuinely crestfallen when a magic pill is not forthcoming. Normally he keeps up his polite smile of rabbinical calm, but he'd let his guard down in discussing his personal life. "Oh. I'm sorry to hear that. Are you handling the break well? Is there anything I can do to support you?" And there it is. The pleasant smile and typical serenity he tends to exude most of the time. Just had to push in the clutch and wrack the gears a bit.

Mei is one of those hypersensitive people that picks up on everything, so she doesn't miss the crestfallen look and the shifting of gears back into rabbi-mode. She winces when she sees it and says, "I'm sorry. No, really, my rabbi isn't what I need right now. I mean, I'm not sure what I do need, except maybe to finish this drink, but..." she shrugs. "It's alright. It wasn't acrimonious, it just wasn't right for us. I like them, a lot, it's just..." she makes a gesture, like she's trying to draw the word out, but shrugs eventually. "I don't know."

"I don't either," Aaron admits, by way of a light bit of humor. He takes another gulp from his glass, then consulting its contents. "I'm just sort of counting the Omer and waiting life out. Day 21, by the way." Another sup of his glass. "Relationships are messy and weird. I do really well on my lonesome, I've found. It's hard for me sometimes to just break out of the mold of rabbi and confidante to anything more. And most of the people I meet, I meet in the context of rabbi and confidante. So I have literally no useful advice for you, anyway. At least not about this aspect of the human condition." A big, gusty sigh follows. "Except for this. Whatever comes from honesty leads you to your truth. If you were honest, you've stepped closer to who you are."

"I'm not always sure how much I like who I am," Mei admits more than a little glumly. "There are things about myself I'm not really the biggest fan of, but at the same time I think they're some of my most important qualities." She huffs out a heavy sigh. "Like when I see something that's wrong--I mean unjust, not simply incorrect--that I think I can do something about, I feel like have to. Which should be a good thing, right? But I'm not good at turning it off again."

This prompts a sudden laugh from Aaron, clearly self-aimed. "I broke that switch off when I was at Hebrew Union and never bothered getting it fixed when it was still under warranty. I'll sleep when I'm dead, I guess." Aaron finishes his cider and slides the empty glass away with a nudge. "When you feel a calling, it's hard to set the work down. Every step closer to the goal is... it's a drug. To me, at least. People talk about ecstasy, sex, getting high. And I'm sure that's all fantastic. But boy howdy, none of it compares-- to me, anyway --to satisfaction. Achievement. Conclusion. Remedy. Healing. I'll be chasing that high the rest of my life, and I think that's how you are, too."

Mei takes a sip, smaller this time, while listening to Aaron talk about his own experiences. "Hm, that's not really what it's like for me. It's interesting that we can have two different reasons, two different approaches, that result in such similar outcomes, though." She takes another drink. "For me it's not like a drug, and I don't even usually get satisfaction from it when I finish. It's more that I can't accept a version of myself that doesn't give everything she has to the pursuit of justice. For a lot of my cases I couldn't really care less, beyond keeping a roof over my head and paying my bills, but for some it matters. And if I take a few hours for myself when something else matters, I feel like I'm letting myself down."

"Tzedek tzedek tirdof," Aaron remarks as though the words were a blessing and a curse. Because they are, in a lot of ways. "I feel that in my bones, Mei. It must be hard pouring yourself into a vocation with so little reward for you after the fact. I'm not certain I could do that as long as you have with no... well. Without the satisfaction being there. But then, you're a private investigator, and I spend a lot of my time teaching Torah to Bar Mitzvah students. It's not the same." Aaron taps a finger again his empty glass, reclaiming it for the stimming if nothing else. "Every once in a while I really stick my neck out, though. That's when I feel the most alive. There's a blog I follow. It started locally, but it's spread around the world now. A movement. It might have something for you. You just. You have to promise me you won't go talking about it if I clue you in."

"Yep," Mei agrees in response to those three words, and she raises her glass to them. "Those words repeat themselves in my head a lot. That, and reminders that even if I can't solve every problem in the world myself, I'm also not free to just abandon the ideal. Even if nobody held me to account but myself, I'm still the one who has to live with myself afterward." She takes another drink and then tilts her head to look over at Aaron. "A movement?" Then she laughs, softly. "Are you afraid the person who puts 'psychic private investigator' on her business cards might not be the best at keeping secrets?"

"That's where I'm going with that, yeah. It's a radical pacifist movement which means discretion is our best defense from. Well. Offense." That isn't technically true, but it's also not technically a lie, either. Aaron seems comfortable with the characterization, though. Aaron pulls out a pen from his pocket and uncaps it, pulling a bar napkin over. "I'm assuming if you're a PI you know how to use TOR." Scribble scribble. "You'll want to connect here. Give it a once over. I post there under the name FlyEaglesFly. If you like what you see, we should talk. Stopping these things before they're funerals, Mei. It's the only thing I've found that helps."

Mei sips her drink while she watches him scribble things down on the napkin and pass it over to her. "A radical pacifist movement?" she asks, not exactly dubious, but definitely curious. "You do know I've been studying martial arts since I was like... 4, right? It's one of the ways I center myself when I need to get myself out of my head for a little bit."

"Have you ever punched someone back to life?" Aaron asks the question bluntly because he knows the answer. "If it's not for you, it's not for you. But I'd be remiss if I didn't offer you a community that bleeds from the same wound as you do." He gestures between the two of them. "As we do."

"No," Mei says with a shake of her head. "I've never punched anyone to death, either. I have kept myself from ending up that way, though. Sometimes my line of work is dangerous." She picks up the napkin and tucks it away, but doesn't make any promises about it. "I hate hurting people, so it's definitely a last resort."

Without giving away the spoilers, Aaron just grins at the mention of defending herself. "There's people like you. Ex military types. Former cops. Clergy and rabbis and imams. Just plain old folks, too. It's not a cult or anything weird like that. Like I said, if you want to check it out, check it out. If not, don't. And if you want to talk about it after, we can. And if you want to come to a meeting after you check it out, we can do that, too." Aaron then lifts both hands up. "But I am starting to sound like I'm selling you rather than offering you something I thought might help, so I'm going to stop. Cos it's not a pitch, just an option."

"I'll check it out," Mei says with a soft laugh and a tone of surrender, but not really. Her curiosity is piqued, and she's not going to be able to help herself anyway. She takes a drink, most of the way through her second whiskey sour in not very long, and then puts it down again. "How did we even end up making our way to this topic from dating?" she asks. "Oh, right. You were looking for advice, and... right. I guess I do have one piece of advice: do your best not to get in your own way by overthinking things."

"What, me? Overthink things?" Aaron offers a faux scoff, piffling his lips and looking to the side as though she were absurd to suggest a guy with a Doctorate in Theology overthinks stuff. "Problem there being if I don't overthink things, I know my hormones are going to get the better of my sense. It's hard not just. You know." Fucking. The rabbi means fucking. "I don't want to take advantage of them. And I want to make sure we're going to gel before I make that sort of step."

Mei lets out a laugh there and reaches over to pat Aaron on the shoulder. "You are definitely talking to the wrong person about that sort of hormone problem," she tells him. "I'm ace, or at least very grey. I don't have that particular issue to contend with except from the other side of it, where someone else is ready to go and I'm most definitely not." She picks her drink up and then gives him a bit of a sideways look. "Also, why are you so sure you'd be taking advantage. Maybe they would be? Or maybe you're just both into each other, and there's not really a good reason not to." She's probably had a little too much to drink if she's just saying this to her rabbi. But she's also still drinking more.

"And I don't really know what I am, if I'm being honest. I'm pretty sure if I were allo, I'd have gone batty over how long it's been. Or maybe I just have real great coping strategies. I dunno." Aaron shrugs his shoulders a bit at this admission. "Oh. It wouldn't be taking advantage in the sense I think you mean. They'd... be very enthusiastic, I'm sure. It's just that, like I was saying, I've only ever dated em oh tees before. If we go off half... heh. If we just go for it and I realize I can't do it, that's where the taking advantage comes into play. Just being all 'oh, sorry, this isn't for me after all'. That's. That's cruel, that's not me. And they deserve so much better than that."

"I couldn't tell you, and I just realized that this is probably a weird conversation to be having with my rabbi," Mei says with a soft laugh. "I'm going to be really embarrassed about this tomorrow, if I remember it." Which she can help prevent by drinking more, which she does, downing the rest of her second whiskey sour. "I guess you just talk to them about all of this, and see what they say?"

"Oh, I know what they'll say. Their relationship with self-preservation instincts are a bit tenuous. Or at least they make a big show of that being the case. Anyway. I'll take your advice and mention to them." Aaron reaches for his wallet and pulls out a few bills, laying them down. "Drinks are on me. Or. At least that amount of drinks are. And don't worry about being embarrassed. You went through a beit din. A rabbi's awkward sex life is a cake walk after that." On that note. "You have a plan for getting home tonight?"

Mei looks at the bills on the bar and then up at Aaron before raising her empty glass. "Thanks," she says a bit tipsily. "This amount of drinks is probably the right amount to stop with. Right now I plan to use a Lyft to get home, and I think if I have another I'll have a bit more trouble making sure that happens. Or that I don't tell them to take me somewhere weird."

"Then why don't you go ahead and call one up, and I'll wait with you until it gets here." She had to know this was going to happen when he sat down, of course. Like he's walking away from a drunk congregant before they're safely on their way home.

Mei looks, very briefly, like she might object, but she nods and takes her phone out instead. It doesn't take long to pull up Lyft and request a ride, and then she puts the phone back in her pocket. "There," she says. "I should have stuck to the cider. It even tastes better."

"It can get pretty alcoholic, too. Certainly more than beer. Less than what you were drinking, admittedly." Aaron then does the most humane thing he can possibly do for future Mei, he flags down the bartender and asks, "Could she get a liter glass of water, please?" The pile of bills in front of him is a strong compulsion to comply with that request, and Mei is shortly delivered a whole lot of plain old fashioned H2O. "Drink that while we wait. You'll thank me later."

"Ooooh yeah. Water is good," Mei says as the water's brought for her, and she picks it up to start nursing it. "I'm not so drunk I'll probably get hung over, I don't think. But it's a good idea anyway." She takes another sip, and then her phone lets her know that her ride is arriving, so she drinks a good portion of the rest of the glass. "Thanks," she tells Aaron. "Maybe I'll see you on Friday." As if he's not going to follow her outside to make sure she gets into the car safely, right?

"I hope so! Counting the Omer is a mitzvah. Gotta catch 'em all!" Aaron slides from his seat and fishes out his phone to check his messages. There are a lot of them. He chuckles, taps a quick response and hits send, shaking his head. Which is to say he's going to pretend to be leaving and delayed until, yes, he makes certain she gets into her Lyft.