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Perhaps at some point Aya will know what a personal sacrifice it is that when Ziv waits for her outside her mosque one evening, here at the beginning of Pride Month (the month where the little trans twink who grew up when being gay was functionally illegal in most of the country must be as visibly queer as possible), that they're not wearing anything with a huge block-print slur and their skirt is more than three microns long.
In fact, the pink and white swishy skirt is most of the way to her knees, and her baby-doll tee with the big block print ALL CAPYBARAS ARE BEAUTIFUL text on it covers her stomach. These are major concessions.
Still, the glittery gold blush and rainbow eyeliner almost make up for it, as they slouch against a lamppost, tiny backpack hanging from their back, texting and idly eyeing the women's entrance. One hand occasionally reaches to adjust the pink and gold kippah clipped to their shaggy dark hair.
The women of the mosque began leaving from their entrance, first with a couple early leavers and then the main group. Near the end, being held up a bit by a conversation that seized her for a little longer, was Aya dressed in black answering a clearly burning question. "No, you can accept the inheritance, even if it's distributed in an improper way; but how you handle what's given to you is a test. Remember those in need." She says with a nod and a smile, waving as she makes her way free of the group. The smile broadens when she sees Ziv!
"Ziv! It's great to see you!" She says, warmly. "I hope you have been doing well!" She goes to greet Ziv, heedless of stares or sidelong glances from more conservative parts of the community.
If only they knew.
"Oooh, that sounded almost Talmudic," Ziv answers, pushing herself away from the lamppost and opening her arms in invitation, the classic 'do we hug? are we hugging?' gesture. The way they say it, that's definitely a compliment. "Shalom aleichem, Aya. Good to see you too. I hope I didn't pick a bad time."
There's something about the way Ziv talks where everything they say feels like it's following some little melody that only they know for sure.
Aya accepted the offered hug without hesitation, "Wa alaikum salaam. There's a good amount of overlap in teachings and jurisprudence; I probably should give more attention to the Talmud. And no, it's a fine time. Is there somewhere you would like to go?"
Their wide, dark eyes glitter, and they wrap their skinny arms around her for a hug that involves a little bit of rocking from side to side, as if they've been friends for years. Of course, a lot of Ziv's movements involve this sort of thing, as though they're in currents only they sense. "That's very true. I think that we have a lot more lateral understanding of one another than the third sibling." Her nose wrinkles up, and she puffs out a little laughter as she steps back, resting on the balls of her feet.
"Well, you're always welcome at home, and it's a short ride, or there's waffles. I'd say coffee, but -- " Some conversations can't be had where sharp ears learn more than they should.
Aya chuckles and nods in agreement with her assessment as the hug ends. "Of course, I'd love to join you at your home, if you'll have me." She adjusts her strap of her bag on her shoulder, "We likely have a good bit to catch up on."
She looks over her shoulder to spot the last lingerer gawking; her eyeroll and headshake seems to send them on their way. "Shall we?" (edited)
They look over their shoulder at that last lingerer, cross their eyes, and stick their tongue out of the corner of their mouth like they're about to take a selfie on a busy Tokyo street. It's a wonder Ziv doesn't throw up a cutesy peace sign and kick up one foot.
Then her attention comes firmly back to Aya. "I never offer what I'm not prepared to follow up on. I'm gonna snag us an Uber, because that is a walk, and I have my limits." The nascent Moros gets a little smile as Ziv tappatappa on their phone. "Sometimes I'm up for taking the trolley, but it's been a week."
A Muslim and a Jew get into an Uber. It sounds like the start to a joke but it's just an awkward seven minutes of intermittent silence and the driver's radio before Ziv hops back out again and leads the way up to the little South Philly row house.
"I understand. May the next week come to you with more ease." she says. She rides along in the car when they arrive, gets out and smiles. "It feels like I was just here the other day, it's been such a whirlwind since, inside and out."
"Thank you." A lot of the time, Ziv demurs or flips her hand in order to dismiss her own difficulties, but this time she just accepts the kind words as spoken. They trundle up the front steps, unlocking and opening the door. "Well, I mean, it hasn't been that long, and... I remember." A small smile. "Aaron and I started dating not long after everything happened for him, so I remember how it can be." They hold the storm door open for Aya, pushing the front door inward, and gesture for her to go ahead. "Don't forget the gravity," she adds with a lowered voice.
"There's something about the experience that seems to prompt reflection; it certainly did for me." She steps in and, minding the gravity, walks forward carefully. "Always a joy to swim without water," she says with a chuckle, moving around a bit more freely once she's started adjusting to the gravity.
"How is Aaron doing, by the way? I hope he's not having a week too."
Laughter bubbles up out of Ziv as she steps into the reduced gravity and starts shedding her Outside Stuff. Jacket, backpack, boots -- the last of which she unzips along the inside and stashes in the cube shelves near the door. "With or without, swimming is always better than walking," Ziv agrees. "How hungry are you?" they ask, and they zoom off towards the kitchen with a lazy flick of their feet. Well, they look like feet to Aya, anyway.
"He's doing okay. I think he was a little worried that he couldn't do everything that needed to be done right away, you know?" Her voice carries fully from the kitchen at the back of the rowhouse, as if she never left the room. "It's always a week for a rabbi, to be truthful, but he's doing okay."
"I could stand to eat," she answers and tries to find a comfortable spot, which is easy enough with gravity being as it is. "I'm glad he's okay, and pray he does even better."
She takes a look off towards the kitchen, curiously craning her neck just a bit, trying to see what might be brought out, "I've been doing well since everything happened, for the most part. I took some time to do that reflecting, and now a lot of people are filling me in on things. I've got someone training me now, too."
"He will. He always does better, if he can help it, every day." Ziv starts bustling around the kitchen. for certain definitions of bustling which include sort of ... floating contently around the kitchen.
They get out the food processor, then a container of garbanzo beans in water from the fridge. The former she plugs in, the latter she drains. "Who's training you?" Ziv asks over her shoulder. "And what are you getting filled in on?"
"Do you know Diamond?" She asks as an answer to the first question. To the second, "Right now, I've been asking around the different Orders, trying to understand where I might fit in. I think I'm getting close to a decision, but it's probably going to be a final call made out of intuition."
She wrinkles up her forehead, goes rummaging in the fridge for another container. Apparently she roasts her own garlic cloves and just keeps a tupperware of them in the fridge. "Do you have any idea how amazing refrigeration is?" Ziv laughs softly. "You don't even have to get ice delivered." Chickpeas, olive oil, roasted garlic, and then the food processor whirs and whirs. "And this!" There's delight in her voice as she talks over the machine.
Once the sound stops, they look back over their shoulder. "I know of Diamond. I don't think we've ever met." A beat. "What are you thinking, Order-wise?" She adds, "I'm an outside observer. I know a little bit about a little bit, because no one pays attention to the little bit of fluff that Talon Yisra'el carries around." Her smile there is wry. A few more rounds of adding water and olive oil, stopping to taste and test consistency, and then she grabs a big serving bowl and empties the fresh-made hummus into it.
Aya moves to watch as she whips things up, smiling, "I have been without refrigeration in my travels, places around the world where both would be a bit of a luxury. I try to remember how immensely blessed I am to live in such a time and place."
She takes a whiff of the air to catch the scent of garlic blended into hummus. "Right now, I'm about fifty-fifty on The Free Council and the Children of the Tree, I think. But I've yet to hear from a member of the Mysterium."
It doesn't take long before the hummus is all prepared, and Ziv scrapes out the food processor into the bowl. There are more steps there, but like, that's not the most interesting thing to pose, so. Hummus and then they're grabbing a paper bag of naan from the fridge. "Aaron brought these home yesterday and they are so good. They're from the shop that just went in like, two block in and one over, Best Butcher?"
She moves like an astronaut, casually pulling herself around the kitchen with one hand on pull bars installed along the counters to make starting and stopping easier. "Here, if you take these," and she holds out the naan package, "I'll grab sodas and the hummus." Ziv smiles lazily, tucking napkins under the bowl so she can bring those, too. "I don't think I know any Mysterium. I've met Guardians, Arrow -- Master Yoshitsune and Esther are lovely -- and some Free Councilors and Children. I think I've met a Silver Ladder?"
"Oh really? I'll have to look into that shop, it's always good to have more options." Aya accepts the naan package with a smile and does her best to make her way around. "I've met a Silver Ladder, a friend of mine from before Awakening, in fact. The Guardians, Arrow, and Ladder have parts to them which I find respectable and good, but I don't think I would fit with any of them."
She gave a soft chuckle and shook her head, "I would say that it might be obvious why the Arrow isn't a good fit, but then I remember that Aaron and I have a similar background and it didn't stop him."
She looks back over her shoulder and smiles lopsidedly. "Awakenings change people," Ziv replies, "or so I'm told. So whatever might have been the case before might not be now." Their legs flick lazily and they zoom back to the living room, way, way faster than she should.
"But I understand why the mindset of being Plain might stick." Ziv drifts to a couch, sets down the hummus and the cans of soda, and settles herself lazily. "There's an Arrow-like group within the Lost, so I get it, truly I do. I couldn't be Summer, in part because someone's got to step back and put them back together."
"I'm still trying to inventory as much as changed for me. I'm still against violence, but I also have been reflecting a bit less positively on some of what I did in the movement." Aya settles into her own seat in the living room, setting the naan in next to the hummus. She reaches for a cola and seems a bit nervous about opening it, "Uhh... with the gravity, it's not going to gush out all over the place when I open this, will it?"
Soft laughter. "No - Aaron built in an exception for soda after the first time that happened. You can still do the astronaut thing if you're determined to, but it's much more difficult."
Ziv smooths her skirt and unwraps the naan, fresh and smelling heavily of garlic. (Yeah, more garlic.) "I don't know much about going from Plain to Awakened, except as I know Aaron, but I know a little about adapting to change. I was Taken from Philly in 1933, when I had just turned 13. The world I came back to, ten years ago... " A little headshake. "I might as well have stepped onto a Star Trek set."
Aya nods, whispers a bismillah, then opens the can and takes a sip. She takes in a nice deep whiff of the garlicky naan, and seeming quite pleased with it, reaches for a piece.
However, when she hears about when she was taken, her eyes go wide, "That had to be a very rough adjustment! And I can only imagine things are not quite what you would've expected back then. It's been a miracle humanity hasn't destroyed itself, as much as we seem to have tried."
"In a lot of ways," Ziv agrees with a subtle, wry smile, and one hand drifts up to absently adjust their kippah. Her dark eyes drift off to one side, then wander away again. "We seem to be trying, but on the other hand, humanity is terribly clever, so maybe we'll figure it out."
Her eyes half-lid, she murmurs her brachot, and Ziv opens her soda very carefully, as if making sure the pop tab won't accidentally injure her somehow. "Everything okay with family and all?"
"I still hope and pray humanity can figure out peace, instead." Aya moves to add some hummus to the naan and nods to Ziv. "Oh yes."
She takes a bite, chewing quickly but thoroughly. "Mother came in from Detroit along with my aunt and uncle-- the one who's been letting me stay in his old house while he lines up a buyer-- to check on me after they heard about my 'episode'. Everyone agrees I have been working too hard." She snorts and rolls her eyes, "And that I should find a husband."
Laughter bubbles out of Ziv at that last sentence fragment. "Ah, yes. Mothers everywhere agree: it would be better if their children were married, preferably happily." A beat. "I'm glad you have family support. Are any of them someone that you can... talk to?" She tears off bits of naan, dips them in the hummus, sips her soda.
Aya shakes her head, "No, they're all Sleepers as far as I can tell, and they fortunately see my 'eccentric interests' as just a part of my academic work and Sufi practices." She takes a sip of her cola and shrugs, "I didn't even let them in on things before Awakening, except for being Plain."
"I'm honestly not sure which part of the family would've had a harder time with me being a medium: the more secular ones or the more religious," she says with a smirk before taking another bite. (edited)
A deep breath in, and one out. "Well. Yeah, that must be challenging," Ziv offers. Her smile is lopsided, and she lounges contentedly.
"So. In case it isn't clear, this is my explicit offer to be Someone You Can Talk To About All This. I'm enough outside the Awakened circles that I'm not going to be in the middle of whatever it is, but I am one of the Lost, and I'm Aaron's partner, so I'm not going to get you in trouble. This isn't to say you must or you even should, really, but... "
"My job at the Freehold is basically that, and it's kind of impossible to turn it off." They make one of those fluttering little gestures of theirs, something like the way a fancy goldfish's tail fins stir in currents.
"I appreciate that, and I'll have to take you up on it. I like to have as many perspectives as possible when dealing with weighty matters, and it seems a lot of matters have become weightier."
She gets more hummus and naan, takes a bite and sighs, "I'm having a bit of trouble deciding which way to go, personally. Whether to start distancing myself from my public facing life to focus on magic, or to put it on and off like a mask, being a symbol and advocate when I need to be. Staying in the public eye requires effort and a different sort of discipline." (edited)
"Good." And that, apparently, is settled.
"Masks... that I know something about. That and balance." Her hand wiggles a little again - she might not even know she's doing it. They pause and look off into the distance, lips pursing as they look for words. "I think that I would probably give up an awful lot to have my family still around. My sister would have loved Aaron. So that will probably color anything I have to say about it."
"I think that if you decide you want to pull back a little bit until you get your feet under you, that would be okay, you know? People get busy, life happens. And it's easier to return to public life more than it is to clean up a mess you accidentally made because you were in your awkward baby goat stage."
Aya listened with focus on Ziv's thoughtful expression and nodded in agreement. "I'm sorry she couldn't meet him, nor the others in your family. I intend to keep in touch with mine as much as I can, no matter what happens, and insha'Allah, I'll keep to that intention regardless of my magical development. I'm hopeful some among them might Awaken as well."
"But that seems smart way to look at it; at least, I should probably not rush back into things, especially not on the same schedule as before. I may want to be more selective in my speaking engagements. And I may choose a new direction, even, and time out can make that easier."
This time, both of their hands flutter in the air for a moment, as if pushing the topic of her own life away. Ziv reaches to get her soda from where it kind of floats next to her, and takes a swallow of it. "Good," she agrees on the matter of family, and that's that.
"That sounds smart," they agree, as if they hadn't just basically suggested it. "I just think that sometimes people try to keep going at the same speed they were before and end up crashing."
"Very true. And for someone as stubborn as I've been, it's a risk." She playfully tosses a piece of hummus'd bread into her mouth with a slow lob from arm's length.
"And more than ever, I'm aware of life being rather short. It feels natural to take things slow now." Aya rubbed her chin idly, "Maybe I can even find time to go out with someone again. And that's something I'd best do while there's less attention on me."
The way they tip their head to the side and look out the corner of their eyes towards her, that might have been part of what she was thinking. Reading people is part of the Joyeaux job, after all. "Mmmhmm."
Laughter, then, that bubbling sound, all crystal-bright. "Ah yes. Especially if you link in to the Greater Philadelphia Supernatural Polycule. This city is even more romantically networked than Seattle, and they have an on-boarding document."
Aya lets out a laugh to join with her but then she took a moment, raising both eyebrows, "Are you.. serious about that? An onboarding document?"
"Seattle?" Ziv blinks twice, and she nods rapidly. "Oh they absolutely do. I think it started out as a joke but then one of the Free Councilors and a Summer got into an argument over whether it was real or not and there was an edit war on a Google doc and after that, the Hierarch and the Winter Queen actually hosted, like, a meeting in which people workshopped it."
"I think that was their punishment for almost starting open war over a Google doc." Ziv wipes a hand down her face. "That's not the reason I came home, but it didn't hurt."
She puts her face in both hands and just lets out quick chuckles, "Ohhhh... wow.." Face freed from palms, she shook her head. "May we follow a more peaceful path and not escalate to such an extent here."
"I didn't know things were quite so connected with everyone, or maybe I simply didn't pay it much mind; I wasn't leaving much room for thoughts about relationships, anyway." (edited)
Another one of those fluttery little gestures. "I mean, it did end up kind of helping, people were less... buttholes... about some things, but yeah, I don't think a polycule should have an on-boarding document, for sure." Ziv's bubbly, glittery laughter ripples through again, and they tip their Sprite back, finishing it and letting the can float above the end table.
"Yeah, I mean, there's some exaggeration in it, but you can kind of track... you know, like. Me, to Aaron, to Lux, and from Lux to Jack and from Jack over to Direct Action, which is a whole... thing, and then from there over to the Firebirds, I think, and... I'm not sure if there's a connection over there to vampires but I know Jack is dating Renault and I am too... I thought about sitting down and plotting the whole thing out once, but then I realized I didn't feel like it, so I didn't."
"That's good to hear, though it certainly sounds a bit complicated. I'm not sure I'm able to keep up with all those connections; I don't even know who Direct Action or the Firebirds are." She chuckles, "I may have to hope for someone outside that web, if they even exist."
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