|
Ylva Theodulus:
Ylva was currently feeling sorry for herself in the hedge. Because it was that or hide in one of the isolation rooms at the center and that is frankly, just a bad look.
So she was sunbathing at the front of her Hollow. Her Fae Mount Octavia circling around her to make sure she is safe.
Wearing one of Vals hoodies that she stole and a pair of loose track pants that she has in her office for times like this. Well, not exactly like this, but it gets the job done. Her mane was a mess, streaked with blood, sweat and the dirt that she is lying on. But she seems to be coming out the other side of it. Mostly.
Asbolus:
As storied of an individual as he was Ylva would likely feel Asbolus' approach before she spotted him, moving at a fair clip along the trod with a fluidity and grace well beyond those untouched by the supernatural. He slowed down as he approached the familiar hollow, a frown crossing his features as her current state made itself clear. "Had a bit of a day, I presume?" He inquired, looking Ylva over from his side of the fence.
Ylva Theodulus:
Ylva nods, not looking up. Knowing who it was. Plus it turns out wearing a hoodie that goes to almost your ankles is hard to move in.
"Yeah. Some. Yeah. I slipped up."
She sighs looking to Octavia. "Can you go let him in for me."
Octavia for her part goes up to the gate and opens it for him as Ylva slowly sits up. Looking very, very, hungover.
Asbolus:
Asbolus gave Octavia a nod as the gate was opened, slipping inside and taking in Ylva's current state with those overly-keen eyes of his. "What happened, and are you alright?"
Ylva Theodulus:
She pulls her tails into her lap. Running her claws through them, brushing out the knots and blood.
A shake of her head. "I nearly murdered Vincent and then went on a bender."
Asbolus:
"Would you like some help with that?" He nodded to her tails, meeting her gaze if she allowed it. "What caused you to strike out at him?"
Ylva Theodulus:
She didnt hold his gaze for long, though that was not unusual for her. Though she nods her head. "Please."
Reaching back to grab the bag of grooming tools that Sigrun gifted her so long ago and handing it to him.
"He was. There was a new dealer on the street around Fairhill. I was trying to follow it to figure out their deal. It ended up being him. And. It dug up so many memories. Powerless memories. But I am not powerless now and I lashed out."
Diffirent to when Asbolus last visited is that there is a lot more art sitting around the main area, all painted by Ylva. Of friends, family, old times and Arcadia.
Asbolus:
He took the offered bag, glancing around for a washcloth or the like to help clear the blood as well. "Ah hah...I see. Thankfully Vincent is a rather resilient fellow, as most of his kind tend to be from what I know."
The art did catch his attention, the pieces from Arcadia earning a longer look. "You've been busy." He said with a small smile. "Very nice work."
Ylva Theodulus:
"He is less resilient than you would think. Or I am more dangerous than I think."
She shuffles awkwardly at that. Her movements sluggish and if he does catch her eyes they are still very dilated.
"Yeah. I am reminded of one of the reasons I used to get high. It makes it easier to paint things, particularly things that are painful. I can move the Arcadia ones if they are painful for you. Some of them are. A lot."
Meaning the ones showing Ylva being a cannibal or being tortured by Him. Never a clear image of Him. Always fleeting.
There would be a cloth in the bag of supplies, along with oils to help remove blood from fur.
Asbolus:
"Could be both. I see you've become a more storied individual as well." He nodded to the additional tail that she hadn't had the last time they spoke, focusing on cleaning the blood first. "Reigning in one's true capabilities can be difficult, especially when one's ire is raised."
"They're fine, no worries there. I was more curious about your take on what happened to you there. Recalling such for myself has been an...interesting process."
Ylva Theodulus:
"I was so close to killing him."
Her words shaky. "I withdrew my true claws at the last moment. If I hadnt."
She shakes her head. The new tail wiggling and poking Asbolus on the snoot.
"My take? What do you mean. Im sorry. My mind is still a little cloudy."
Asbolus:
"Thankfully you did not, but focusing on the what-ifs will only cause you stress that you don't need at the moment." He set aside the cloth once the blood was taken care of, claiming a brush and gently working through the knots on one of the tails. "What happened after that?"
He smirked a touch at the boop, then nodded towards one of the Arcadian paintings. "How you see what happened to you there, and how you put that to canvas."
Ylva Theodulus:
She nods her head slowly. Leaning back against Octavia who has curled up behind her.
"We talked a little, I found out why. He is trying to deal clean drugs, not to kids, sending people to the center. But, my mind wouldnt calm down. Memories swirling. Arcadian and before. Of my time on the streets." A shudder at those memories. "So I ran. Unfortuonately. To find him. I had been buying drugs, working up the chain of command. So I ran with enough drugs to kill a Human. I hid in the Guym. Destroyed a corner and myself."
Looking down at her hands which still have a hint of a wound in each palm from her own claws.
"I see it blurrily and confusingly. Clearer over the last few nights. Which. Is not really a good thing."
Asbolus:
"I would guess that it's the first time in a while that you've used said substances?" He inquired, glancing at the lingering wounds on her hands before nodding. "Such clarity is both a blessing and a curse, I've come to find."
Ylva Theodulus:
She shakes her head.
"Not since." She takes a while to think. "Before Arcadia. I dont know how long before that. Its hard to process time. With the dilation of Arcadia. But at the very least a few months before Arcadia."
Asbolus:
"A good while, then." He gave another nod. "A slip backwards along the path is a given over time, though, and you shouldn't beat yourself up too much about it."
Ylva Theodulus:
"The bad part is im not."
She says shamefully. "Its why im here. I cant get any more here. And. I want more. I want that feeling again. Or lack of feeling really."
Asbolus:
"Acknowledging that is important, for what that's worth. You know that pursuing it will do more harm than good, even if it may make you feel 'better' in the short term."
Ylva Theodulus:
She nods her head slowly.
"Yeah. I know. I've been there. I lost years of my life to that. But. Its there. Again. More. More than it has been in a while."
Asbolus:
"Finding something else to fill that need is paramount, lest you slip back into old habits. Are there other things that you find fulfilling in the same way?"
Ylva Theodulus:
She chews at her lip. Enough to draw blood but doesn't notice it.
"Yes. Probably. But."
A sigh. "I can't see them when I am still slightly high. And it turns out it takes a while to come down from that much. Everything."
Asbolus:
"Careful there." He commented, pulling a handkerchief from his pocket and offering it to her. "Bit a bit too hard."
"Which 'them' are you referring to?"
Ylva Theodulus:
She reaches up dabbing with her finger before using a handkerchief.
"Thank you.'
"The things that bring joy. I'm at the end. So it's all wearing off. And. I just want more. Earlier when it was still in my system I could paint. But now. I just want more."
Asbolus:
He nodded quietly, moving to another tail to help clear out the next batch of tangles. "Is there anything I can do to help?"
Ylva Theodulus:
She pokes him in the snoot with the tail he is trying to brush at.
"This is good."
A little laugh.
"People tends to be the best thing. It's the best distraction."
Asbolus:
He chuckled, lightly bapping the tail in return. "Glad I can be of service, then."
Ylva Theodulus:
She smiles at that.
"Plus you complimented my art. That is always an ego boost."
Asbolus:
"True indeed. I always appreciated getting accolades after a performance."
Ylva Theodulus:
There is a blush at that.
"Yeah. I kinda miss tattooing as much as I used to. But the center is worth it. It's satisfying in its own way."
Asbolus:
"Indeed. I feel the same way with my work at the theater. As much as I would like to go back on stage, keeping things running smoothly for everyone is just as important if not more so."
Ylva Theodulus:
She nods her head.
"Yeah. Plus it's harder to hide things now that. I'm a little more storied as you put it."
Asbolus:
"Masking that has become a challenge, moreso than it already was." He nodded, gesturing with his hand in a notably fluid manner. "I know I'll need to step back from more mundane endeavors in time, but I've been able to keep at it for the time being."
Ylva Theodulus:
"Thankfully just managing a center I've been able to do so far. But."
She flexes her arm. Almost ripping the jacket she is wearing.
"I did nearly pull a door off the hinges the other day."
Asbolus:
"Impressive." He smirked a touch. "My own development has been more along the dexterous bent, along with a sharpening of the senses."
Ylva Theodulus:
"That sounds less dramatic to navigate."
She blushes looking down.
"Really glad I have Val to experiment with before I break my wife."
Asbolus:
"Perhaps, but being mindful of the fact that I can both perceive and react to things that others won't notice as easily is challenging in its own way."
He smiled quietly at that, giving a nod. "A definite perk there. I don't have a partner myself on that front, although I have been keeping an eye out."
Ylva Theodulus:
She nods her head.
"In the same way as Vorp or Avy."
Another blush.
"You should work on that. Your a cute boy. I'm sure we can find you a cute bean."
Then she adds. Giving Asbolus a kinda flirty look.
"Okay technically I am craving wildly dangerous sex but none of my partners should come to the hedge."
Asbolus:
"Indeed." He nodded, a sheepish smile creeping in at the compliment. "Thank you, and I've been on the lookout for a good while now. Finding someone whom I can be properly open with has been challenging, though, so the search continues."
"You're not my type, unfortunately." He offered with a quiet chuckle.
Ylva Theodulus:
"Okay now I'm curious what your type is?"
She says with a chuckle.
"I know I can be. Allot."
Asbolus:
"Male or male-presenting, for starters. Beyond that, I'm...still feeling that out, in truth. I knew what it was before I was Taken, but it's shifted since. The last man I felt feelings for was decidedly outside of my previous type, but it felt...right at the time."
Ylva Theodulus:
She nods her head faking a little pout.
"I can understand that. It turns out trauma makes things complex."
A hand twitching up to her stomach.
"I used to like men. Then one of them tattood their dick on me. Now. Less so."
Asbolus:
"Truer words were never spoken." He said with a small smirk, although that mirth faded as she continued. "Now that is dispicable. Sorry to hear that happened."
Ylva Theodulus:
She shrugs.
"It turns out when you live on the street and a guy offers you shelter and food. Yeah."
A bit of a pause. "My wife covered it up for me a few years ago. It's pretty now."
Asbolus:
"Needs must and all that." He nodded quietly. "Good to hear."
"Never had a particular inclination to have a tattoo done myself, I'll admit. If an idea does come up, though, I'll certainly talk with you about it."
Ylva Theodulus:
"I would be more than honored to tattoo you."
She looks down at her arm.
"I think that's one of the things that makes me sad. You can't see my tattoos anymore. Well. We can't anyway. Unless I reinforce my mask."
Asbolus:
"I do have one, in a sense, although it's more of a brand." He tapped near his collarbone briefly. "A sign of Her blessings from while I was away."
"That is a shame. I wouldn't mind seeing them at some point, if you feel so inclined."
Ylva Theodulus:
"Ah."
She says with a sad nod. "I could, turn that into something that you chose. If you'd like. Ive done some scar work before. Never brands but."
Trailing off she shrugs. "if you wanted." Really struggling with enthusiasm.
Leaning back into the bag of holding that is Octavias pouches she pulls out an iPad. Handing it over to Asbolus, she makes sure it is in the right folder. Though the outside of it is still covered in essentially porn stickers. "There. I have photos from before I. Left."
(It is a folder of Risque Ylva photos that show all of her tattoos. Aproxamitly 75% of her body is tattood)
Asbolus:
"I appreciate the offer, but I must decline. I've kept it intact as a reminder of my escape from Her rather than a mark of Her ownership."
He took the offered iPad, eyeing it briefly to make sure it hasn't gone screwy as tech tended to do in the Hedge before looking through said pictures. He skimmed through the photos, admiring the artistry more than anything. "Very impressive work."
Ylva Theodulus:
"Ah, yeah. I can understand that."
She blushes at the compliment. "Thank you. Most of it was done by my wife and my Mo." An awkward cough. "lover."
Asbolus:
He chuckled at the quick correction, giving a nod as he handed back the iPad. "I see...take it the three of you worked together at some point?"
Ylva Theodulus:
"Yeah. I did some of it. My thighs and my left forearm are done by me. Astrid and Jenny did my back. My face is one of the few places that we didnt do."
Her hand moving up to touch at her face. The fur there is thin enough that some of the vine work comes through.
Asbolus:
"Quite the canvas indeed." He nodded, smiling a touch. "Have you thought about trying dyes on your fur or the like to do new designs that way?"
Ylva Theodulus:
"I. Hadnt."
She looks down at her tails and mane. "That could work. I wonder if it would affect the mask. I went through a lot of growth to not feel the need to hide that im albino."
Asbolus:
"I couldn't say, admittedly. It may be worth a try, though." He gave another nod. "Nor should you have to hide that, in my opinion. It suits you very well, if I may say so."
Ylva Theodulus:
Ylva smiles at that. Her hand running through her mane. "I hid it when I was younger. Running. Living on the street. Trying to blend in."
Asbolus:
"Understandable, that. It's a shame that you had to do so, though."
Ylva Theodulus:
"Live on the street or dye my hair."
She says with a chuckle. Leaning into the contact.
Asbolus:
"Both." He chuckled, leaning against her in kind as he continued to work through the snarls of fur in her tails. "It's a rough life to life, and I'm glad you got through it in mostly one piece."
Ylva Theodulus:
There is a raised eyebrow at that.
"One piece? We can dream yeah."
She sighs a hand moving to he heart.
"Mostly one piece I guess."
Asbolus:
"I know that 'mostly' is carrying a lot of weight. But, in the end you're here, and that's the important thing. You've made it through all the trials and tribulations that you've suffered, and still you stand."
Ylva Theodulus:
She wiggles her butt into the ground.
"Id say I'm sitting."
With a laugh.
"Yeah. I'm still alive. That's the thing right? One day at a time right?"
Asbolus:
"Touche." He said with a chuckle. "And indeed. The individual days may be rough, but they do smooth out over time."
Ylva Theodulus:
She tries her best to smile.
"I could do with less of the rough days and a little more of the smooth days. But. We are getting there. My only drug related slip up since getting home. I'd call that a win. If I was to be generous."
Asbolus:
"I would call it one as well. Considering the moments of stress you've been under since returning, it taking this long is quite the achievement."
Ylva Theodulus:
"I had people helping me. I."
She sighs. "I pulled away from them. Isolated myself. Just like I used to. I'd isolate and then someone would find me in a shelter after a bender. So not much has changed. It was just my shelter this time."
Asbolus:
"I understand that want to withdraw, to see 'safety' in solace. It's a hard habit to break, but realizing it is an important step in doing so."
Ylva Theodulus:
"Yeah. I always tend to do it around this time of year."
She looks away unable to make eye contact.
"Spending your holidays in a homeless shelter tends to really fuck a girl right up."
Asbolus:
"I don't doubt it. It may be hard to remember in the moment, but you have people here who will support you in your time of need. If you reach out they will come, no question of that."
Ylva Theodulus:
"Yeah. I know it. That's the issue though isn't it."
Her voice growing soft.
"Reaching out. Asking for help. Not just lying in the sun and sulking."
Asbolus:
"That it is." He nodded, giving a knowing look. "You think that you'll be fine if you keep it to yourself, not bother anyone else with what's troubling you. All that does is leave that weight on your shoulders, dragging you down when those who care will happily help you bear the load as much as they can."
Ylva Theodulus:
She nods her head.
"Then one little thing breaks your will and you end up. Here."
Her claws dragging through the dirt.
Asbolus:
"Mmhmm." He gave another nod, patting her tail lightly. "You don't have to stay here, though."
Ylva Theodulus:
She squirms at the pat. Somebody's tails are rather sensitive
"I don't mean here as in the Hedge. I mean here as in nearly murdering someone and going on a binge."
Yes she did say that like its happened before.
Asbolus:
"Right." He allowed himself a small smirk, finishing the last of the detangling before setting the brush aside. "I meant in a more metaphorical sense as well, in this case."
Ylva Theodulus:
"Ah."
She moves turning around and removing the hoodie to expose her mane which is about as matted.
"Would you? I want to look presentable before I try to talk to people."
Asbolus:
"Of course." He helped her out of the hoodie as needed before reclaiming the brush and going to work to gently untangle the knots in her mane. "And if you need someone to reach out to in the future, don't hesitate to call."
Ylva Theodulus:
"Id say I won't. But."
A shake of her head.
"Here we are. I'll try to keep that in mind yeah."
Asbolus:
"That's as much as I can ask. I've been in similar straits myself, and as someone once offered their hand to me I am more than willing to pay that forward."
Ylva Theodulus:
Ylva nods her head sitting quietly as he continues. Sitting in her thoughts. Working out the last of the drugs in her system.
When he is close to done there is a soft.
"Thank you."
Asbolus:
Asbolus remained quiet as well as he worked, his own thoughts going back to a similar moment of closeness with another who had since departed. He smiled softly at the whisper, nodding quietly. "You're welcome."
|