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Rieko: Hey!!! Aaron!!!! This is Eko (Rieko) ((Ziv's other partner!!!!)) I wanted to check in and see how you were doing!
Aaron: Hello, Rieko. Good. Ziv's good, too. They're finally sleeping it all off.
Rieko: Excellent!!! I have been very worried! They deserve a nice nap!!!
Rieko: We were up pretty late last night but I guess sleep must've not taken because they were up and Ironside before me
Aaron: We ended up grabbing waffles at Maddy's and just doing normal stuff.
Aaron: Until they were super tired and ready to stay asleep.
Rieko: How was the food? Have you had the double chocolate chip waffles?? They're literally incredible. Sometimes, when you've lived on basically bread and water for a thousand years or so you just wanna cram a lot of sugar into your mouth. If you find this experience relatable I highly recommend the waffles. With extra syrup.
Rieko: Also thats adorable!!!!
Aaron: Yeah, I ALWAYS grab the waffles. Maple syrup. Two eggs and hash, and toast.
Aaron: Breakfast meats are rarely kosher, so.
Rieko: That's fair! That makes sense! I do not know much about your religion but I do know that!!!
Rieko: The latter thing, not that you always get waffles
Aaron: The waffle thing may be a minhag, I'd have to check.
Aaron: That last one was a joke.
Aaron: So I did want to say. The Union for Reform Judaism offers Intro to Judaism courses that you can take. You don't have to be a believer, you don't have to want to convert, you just have to want to learn. If that's you, you can learn in a class setting and ask questions of myself and other rabbis, rebbes, and speakers.
Aaron: That's not the *only* structure for that, but it's something Ziv and you can do together, and I know it would mean a lot to them.
Rieko: Oh, that would be super helpful actually.
Rieko: I do not know a lot - and I am very uncomfortable (and somewhat nervous, but don't say I said that) of exploring this - but I would like to try to at least have a functional vocabulary because they (and now you!) are important to me!!!
Aaron: Why are you uncomfortable? Maybe I can help with that.
Rieko: I am not trying to say that all religions are the same -- and I know that historically, many of these men (including the men in my country!!) were terrible in many places beyond -- but I come from a time and place where many used their beliefs as a shield to do terrible things.
Rieko: So it is a deep scar!
Aaron: That's every time. That's even in our holy books. It's a valid concern, and I'm sorry for your pain.
Rieko: Sorry, what's every time?
Aaron: Every period in history has had people like that. Our religion even warns us about them. To be on guard for them.
Rieko: Also I appreciate your apology, but you were not alive when these things were done. You have nothing to apologize for :)
Aaron: Today's Mike Pence is yesterday's Haman. He's one of those old jerks in history that tried to kill all of us, so we throw a party and boo him and make fun of his hat while drunk once a year.
Rieko: That's amazing. What a good thing to celebrate! Fuck that guy!
Rieko: What did his hat look like?? Was it actually bad or is it just bad because it was his hat?
Aaron: The hat plays a pivotal role in the story. Because one of the Jews refuses to remove his hat for the king. We have a dessert we serve around the time of the holiday concerned called hamentaschen. They look kind of like tricorn hats.
Rieko: Oh, interesting! I just looked them up on Google and they do look very much like those hats!
Aaron: They're actually really delicious. If you want to drop by sometime, I can help you bake some using my bubbe's recipe. Ziv would go nuts for them.
Rieko: Really? You'd do that for me??? :D
Aaron: You asked me for help, this is help! Being able to keep a Jewish home is helping them, too. So I don't mind.
Rieko: !!!!!!!!!!
Rieko: You're so good!!
Rieko: Hey also can I ask a quick question that may be more personal????
Aaron: I don't have to answer, mind you, but sure. :)
Rieko: Of course! You don't have to answer anything you don't want to!
Rieko: How new to Poly stuff are you? :o
Aaron: Really.
Aaron: A few months. And this is my first time having more than one partner, myself.
Rieko: I got a vibe but I didn't want to assume! Was the other night the first time you've met a partner's partner?
Rieko: 'Cause if so HAHA BIG OOF ON THAT FRONT and I'm sorry.
Aaron: Not precisely. But I knew my other partner's partners before we were involved, so it was different. But it was my first time being with a partner's partner AND my partner at the same time.
Rieko: Ahh okay that makes sense. Are you doing okay on that front? I know I'm kinda a lot sometimes so if I'm being annoying or in-your-face just let me know and I will chill!
Aaron: Yeah, actually. It's actually easier with you, because you're a woman. I know that's really kind of sexist of me, but we're very different for as much as we're alike. Ziv isn't attracted to just men. And I'm just a man.
Rieko: Maybe a little bit - but also there *is* the very real relief of being able to, like, look at the situation and think of the different things we bring to the relationship. Even if, in this, the superficial distinction is tits. Tho I mean I've seen those pecs so:
Rieko: :Eyes Emoji:
Aaron: Yeah. In the back of my head is the awareness that you're not a better version of me. I'm not somehow insufficient for being who and what I am. That's really all that is. You bring stuff to the table that I have no inclination to bring to the table, if you follow me.
Rieko: For what it's worth, I think that even if we were both *nearly identical* Ziv chose us both for the sliver of difference! Which honestly is super cool!!!!
Rieko: Also you're very great and admittedly I was slightly jealous the first time they didn't come home. If that helps at all!
Rieko: But I do not follow you!!!
Rieko: oh, the sword???
Rieko: or wait. Being a girl??
Aaron: Being a woman, yes.
Aaron: At least that's my assumption. Ziv used she/her pronouns for you.
Aaron: If I'm wrong there, I apologize.
Rieko: Yeah! I mean. Gender is a weird subject for me, but you're technically not wrong. She/Her pronouns are the correct pronouns!
Rieko: The "if you follow me" threw me because I was like "okay I follow you" but then you asked if I followed you and I was like "okay but am I following you??? Did I miss something???
Rieko: Congrats: I played myself.
Aaron: I don't like reducing people to gender. It's reductive and cruel, most often.
Aaron: Very rarely in my life has my masculinity been brought up in a way I enjoyed.
Rieko: Oh? What do you mean?
Aaron: Which statement are you asking about?
Rieko: The masculinity one. You seem pretty classically masculine, but also, like. Not a toxic version of it? A legitimately good man??? I'm just -- and not that I'm trying to discount your experience at all -- confused as to what there could possibly be to complain about???
Aaron: Oh, exactly. I enjoy being a man. I enjoy my masculinity. But very few people have anything positive to say about a man who shows emotion or exhibits tenderness or expresses weakness or asks for help or nurtures. Plus until Lux and Ziv I would have told you I was a gay man. Gold star gay man even, not that I care about that. Society dislikes what I am, and very often lets me know that. So I just try to avoid compliments involving gender if I can.
Rieko: That's very fair! I guess I hadn't considered that. It's not quite the same but there are similarly weird standards for trans women, too. Depending on the people you're conversing with, you may be expected to simultaneously uphold the burdens of both experiences. It's not a winnable scenario, so I just try my best to avoid those conversations.
Rieko: Similarly conflicting* I should say. The expectation to conform to a pair of standards that are not complimentary*
Aaron: Oh! I wasn't aware you were trans. Neat! Thank you for trusting me with that.
Rieko: Honestly I still just assume that most people just know on sight!
Rieko: HRT did not exist when I transitioned. Well it did but it was... I think probably not terribly helpful. Makeup worked tho! It's too humid here for makeup tho
Rieko: Admittedly I still feel a little unarmored without it because it was all I had once upon a time, but I'm glad I don't need it, apparently!!!
Aaron: Asking a gold star gay his opinion on women is, admittedly, a bit like asking a dog about astrophysics, but.
Aaron: I will wag my tail and be happy because you are happy. :)
Rieko: Hahaha that's very fair. Big mood tho. Not about women but just about things in general. "I will wag my tail and be happy because you are happy." Love that. Can I steal it???
Aaron: Sure. :)
Rieko: That's awesome, you're awesome!
Rieko: it's not, like, an obligation or anything but do you wanna hang out sometime??? I like hiking and swimming and baseball
Aaron: I think that that sounds weird to me and it shouldn't so I am going to say yes and deal with it. I'm not much for the first two, but used to play baseball and football. First base and running back respectively.
Rieko: I never played Baseball but I think it's neat! I used to live near the Astrodome!! It was closed by then but Im sure it was VERY COOL to see a game in
Rieko: What kind of stuff do you like to do???
Rieko: Also I'm sorry that's weird! We don't have to if you're uncomfortable :)
Aaron: I don't want it to be uncomfortable. And so I'll deal with it. :) I like helping people. I volunteer at the Attic Youth Center as a chaplain. I like helping congregants. I like studying Torah. I enjoy physical training. Jogging, lifting, jiu-jitsu, aikido, kickboxing, stuff like that. I'm a bit of a foodie, too.
Rieko: HEY WE CAN DO THAT STUFF
Rieko: I like jogging and physical training too. And also food!!!
Rieko: Do you know how to use weapons, or do you usually just do hand stuff???
Aaron: At some point I'll begin training. My sensei is a ... actually, you'd *really* like my sensei.
Rieko: Oh????
Aaron: [| Attached Picture]
Rieko: OH!!!!!!
Aaron: I don't think he's met a weapon he can't master. He's amazing.
Rieko: how old is he???
Rieko: is he from when Im from????
Aaron: I honestly have no idea. People say he predates the Meiji restoration.
Rieko: ME TOO
Aaron: He's from Kyoto.
Aaron: I don't know if he is from there originally, but it's all he talks about of Japan.
Rieko: Oh shit!!!!
Rieko: I'm from Edo!!
Rieko: Err! Tokyo!
Aaron: Anyway. I only fight unarmed. I was a pacifist once, and carrying a blade or the like still feels like I'm seeking violence. I can control how much I hurt people, if at all, with my hands and feet and such.
Rieko: I've never killed anyone before, and I have no intention of starting.
Rieko: There are ways you can fight - weapons you can use - that aren't lethal, but I understand where you're coming from. I have to carry a weapon with me everywhere I go. I can't... not carry one anymore, so I had to learn very quickly how destructive mine can be if used without restraint
Rieko: Also sorry Im like actually really emotional about your sensei!!! Can you ask him if I can meet him??? I've never met anyone from when I'm from
Aaron: Sure. I can ask him. He's a pretty private man, but there's a kindness to him you wouldn't expect from such a hardass. If you want to impress him? He loves tea. And sake. But. Like. *Good* sake..
Rieko: Tea I can definitely do!
Rieko: I imagine that he is private - at least as private as most Lost usually are - considering he's from so long ago, but it would mean an indescribable amount to me.
Rieko: ALSO when are we hanging out? :)
Aaron: I don't know? Shabbos is for rest for me, usually.
Rieko: Define "rest?" Can you go places and do stuff? I assume training is out, but we could go for a run in the park and then get food, probably?
Aaron: So. Depends on who you ask. I go by the metric of anything that feels like work or is expressly forbid in Torah or the Talmud. But then we've also got what's called an Eruv around parts of center city philadelphia that for the purposes of Jewish law is *like* the walls of a house. And it's blessed and kept kosher-- though part of it is down at the moment --so. Really, I shouldn't even be leaving the house, technically.
Rieko: Then we should probably hang out after that, then! Especially if muscling through uncomfortable feelings seems like work! Also I'm going to get your things tonight when it gets dark so I'll need your address!
Aaron: [Address off Snyder in South Philly, near broad.]
Aaron: Be careful.
Rieko: I will do my best to be careful. Thank you for worrying!
Rieko: I doubt that it'll be a problem c:
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