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Vorpal:
Jackie's room is in the basement of Direct Action's place in Philly- which should surprise absolutely nobody. It's been a bit since Vorpal was part of... parting... Snowy from her keeper, and the majority of that time? She's been right here. The act was a huge blessing- but it carried a cost and one that Vorpal was desperately reluctant to let someone else pay on her behalf. Did she ask Jack to come visit? Was he just upstairs seeing Teagan and stop by for a visit? Did he seek her out for some reason on his own?
Any could be the case, with how damaged Jackie's grip on things feels right now.
Jack:
It's rare, that Jack spends time in Direct Action's place outside of Teagan's room, and the occasional sojourn to the kitchen or the bathroom.
But as much as Jack is Teagan's partner, he's also a Spring. A pretty emotionally astute one, at that, and there's been enough stress among the motley that here he is, with a cup of tea in each hand, knocking politely on the doorframe of Jackie's room. The scent of his Mantle announces his presence, if Jackie is paying attention to that, and the man himself is as sketchy as always, the charcoal lines that make up his Mien lazily drawing his outline at the moment.
"Hey, Jackie."
Vorpal:
"Mngh. Minnit." There's some rustling. Padded cloth, other cloth, a click. Light appears under the doorframe after the latter. There aren't footsteps, though. "C'min."
The door is unlocked, and inside is... a very, very normal room.
The bed is simple- wooden frame, four posts, headboard- completed with quilt, comforter, sheets. That's where Jackie is, with a too-big tee-shirt draped over wispy blackness. Does she have shadows under her eyes? Ha! Trick question, the answer is always yes. But the eyeshapes suggest a bit of a droop, and much can be inferred from such.
"Oh, hey, Jack. You look- thirsty."
Jack:
The Spring chuckles quietly at Jackie's observation, and he shrugs. "I always gotta hydrate. Thought you might be thirsty too - but I'll drink both mugs if you don't want it..."
Being invited in, he does step over the threshold. His dark eyes cast his curious gaze around the room, but most of his attention remains on the Darkling in bed as he brings the tea over.
"I was gonna ask how you are but shit's been...a lot lately, yeah?"
Vorpal:
The outline flickers, jitters, like a badly rendered frame of a video, settles. About the same time as the offer of tea. "Mnh. Nope. That makes'em both your teas," Jackie says firmly. "... does tea count as a hydrating drink? Isn't caffeine a... uh... dioram- diuretic. Purges water. Right?"
"Oh. How I've been. Um! Well, I was sorta half and half after the Marks. On the one hand, fuck everything for having to fight them off like that. On the other, winning felt like breathing fresh air after three years in space or something. Surviving something nobody's meant to survive. That was cool. And that all got... theoretically resolved, which is good.
And then we saved Snowy."
She sort of lets that hang. She's not sure how much Jack knows. She's not sure how much -anyone- knows, really.
Jack:
A beat, and Jack blinks, charcoal dust glittering on his eyelashes, and nods. "Right. My drinks. Not for you." He sets one down next to the bed after he says it, and takes a sip of the one in his hand.
"Pretty much everything but alcohol hydrates you more'n it dehydrates you," Jack shrugs. "Water's probably best, but...this is better than nothing, and it tastes better." Another sip of tea, and he falls silent as Jackie explains.
"I heard you were involved with the Marks. Fucking bullshit fascism, I...mmm." He grimaces. "I'm not telling you anything you don't already know."
And then Jackie drops what is probably a bomb of a sentence, but for all of Jack's reaction, Jackie might have mentioned that it had been a little warm lately.
"That's the kid you pulled out of the hedge the other day? I...admit I've been busy Ironside. I know they swore to the freehold, but not much beyond that."
Vorpal:
"Oh! Cool. That's good to know. And yeah, tea is significantly tastier. It was also, like. The only acceptable drink in my home growing up. At least until you got old enough to Drink," Jackie confirmed. With a cup successfully claimed and abandoned, she sneaks it into her own hands with a bit of shadow from under the bed.
"Yeah. Kinda got mixed feelings about it. I WAS aiding and abetting a murderer and obstructing justice, but at the same time-" She shakes her head. "They shouldn't exist and I shouldn't have been in that position in the first place. But I was, so."
A nod at that last sentence. "Mhm. Snowy's a Helldiver, like me. We caught her following us, with her Silver Thread intact."
Jack:
The Spring politely pretends not to notice this blatant thievery, and nods along. "Sometimes all the choices are shitty. For what it's worth, I think you made the right call."
His outline shifts and shudders a little as he leans against one of the bedposts. "Another Helldiver like that...sounds complicated, for you." It's a gentle invitation for Jackie to elaborate, if she wants to.
Vorpal:
"Yeah. I think I did, too. Just challenging not to be bitter about it sometimes," Jackie admits quietly.
"It was... exceedingly strange in the moment. For reasons I struggle to explain. I don't- remember what happened to my own Thread. It had to Go Someplace- but I couldn't tell you what happened or how. So this was the first Thread I ever saw severed.
And I cut it."
She lets that sit a moment, then amends.
"No. That's not fair. I didn't cut it. I held the thing that did, and Jack-"
She's speechless a few moments. "It was... Beautiful."
Jack:
The distinction Jackie makes between doing and action and holding the thing that did makes Jack's eyebrow arch, a slight shadow of charcoal smudge left behind for half a second.
"Do you want me to ask about the difference there?" The slightest hint of amusement - he knows he's pushing, and would probably be fine with Jackie telling him not to.
Vorpal:
"The difference is- that had I been holding anything else, it wouldn't have worked. And had anyone else been holding The Knife, it'd have worked. It had nothing to do with me, it just happened to be my hand on the handle. And me paying its price. Does- does that makes sense?" Jackie asks quietly. "I know it sounds strange to cast oneself in a bit part relatively to an inanimate object, but I swear to you, Jack, if you'd seen what I saw."
Jack:
"I just wanna make sure that..." he trails off with a small frown, an runs a distracted hand through his hair as he tries to think of the words. "I wanna make sure that you...aren't...dissociating yourself from it for Clarity reasons, I guess. It - using a weapon as powerful as this thing sounds like...I wanna make sure that you feel like you're making those choices, you know? If you...have to use it in other ways, in the future. Maybe it would be different if I'd seen it, I dunno."
Vorpal:
"Oh, heck, no. I made the decision, I was absolutely the impetus behind beginning the Action, Jack. But the moment I did, the moment I fed the Knife what it needed to Be Itself, it-"
Jackie is visibly flustered at her inability to express to Jack exactly how incredible that moment was. "It doesn't feel like you're not in the driver's seat, it feels like you're the conductor on the train of Life and you just pulled the lever to switch tracks. I have never, in my life, seen anything with so much... Story to it, Jack. And I know it's Story, because I made it. And I cannot fathom how that came from something I did."
She's quiet a long few moments.
Jack:
Jack lets out a slow breath, like he's making an honest attempt at staying calm and unbothered. "That sounds...like a very dangerous weapon. I mean if it cuts Threads like that, but..." he can't quite keep the discomfort out of his voice, at Jackie showing so much reverence to a knife, like that.
"How did you make it?"
Everest (He/Her) - Vorpal:
"It IS dangerous, but it... has... a cost. And I don't know whether it's such a heavy cost because my own Story is so heavy, or if it's a heavy cost and we're lucky I'm as stable as I am," Jackie states quietly. "I'm- I'm... if I'm honest, Jack, I'm kind of worried it's the former. Because if it is, this amazing, fascinating thing I made...
... renders me the worst person I know to wield it."
The question was a welcome reprieve. "Ah- well- do you remember the attempt on Doll and Peter Wood?"
Jack:
The charcoal that makes up Jack's silhouette flickers and shifts uneasily at the mention of the Woods.
"That whole situation put a target on my back for a bit, yeah. I'm not going to forget it any time soon."
Vorpal:
"Right- well, I kept the sword they tried to use for all that nonsense after I locked it in time. I figured- once I confirmed it had no magic upon it whatsoever- that if I took the broken pieces- oh, I broke it into pieces, aha- of a weapon from a severed timeline used to sever lives, I might be able to make something so distilled of the essence of severance that I might be able to cut silver cords. So I buried them under timelocked rocks in a hedge creek and left them there.
For... like... a year."
Jack:
Jack's eyebrows go up and up and up as Vorpal tells her story, and he lets out a low, impressed whistle. "That's...that'd make a hell of a knife. Sounds like it did make a hell of a knife. You think the cost is...connected to whoever uses it? Or it's always gonna be what it is because you're the one who made it?"
Vorpal:
"..."
That last thought hadn't occurred to Jackie, and she visibly grimaces, her shadowface scrunching in upset. "... I hope not. I think it turns your Story against your Stability. But fuck if I know if that's accurate for anyone but me. I hope it doesn't turn my fucking Story against anyone using it, that'd be fucking monstrous." She slumps back into bed and stares at the ceiling. "But then... that's how all the best legends work, isn't it? There's always a catch. Some big nasty reason why you don't take them out to flail at every Tom, Dick, and Harry that rises up."
She's quiet a moment, thinking it all over.
"I'll have to ask someone else to use it, I guess."
Jack:
"What's the cost?" It's a quiet question, and Jack takes a sip of his tea.
Vorpal:
"I'm- very stable. You have to be, to support- to survive- a Story like mine. And the moment I used the Knife- gods, Jack, it tore me in half. It felt like the world became spun glass, like anything I did could splinter me through the surface and hurl me back where nothing made sense anymore."
"I think there's people that would have been rendered comatose by what I endured."
Jack:
Another sip of tea, which doesn't hide Jack's growing frown. "I guess...it makes sense that something that's powerful enough break Threads would break whoever used it, too. Enough that...even though it's incredible, what it can do, it...isn't gonna be something anyone uses without a good reason."
Vorpal:
"Exactly. It isn't- it isn't a weapon, it's not a tool, it's... a story, Jack. And its story is gonna pass through some intense scenes, but the only ink goes on those pages is brewed from sanity, so won't be pages written if the cost to not write isn't high enough. That's my take, anyway."
Jack:
"Not to get all therapist-y about it, but...how's that feel? To have...something like that. To have made something like that?" The Spring seems genuinely curious. but there's definitely a small bit of concern in his expression.
"And...I dunno, I guess...can the Freehold help you carry all that?"
Vorpal:
"... it feels lots of ways," Jackie admits. "At once. Like writing an amazing story nobody's considered before.
And like writing myself out of it. It's more important than I am. That's how it feels. Like- like Arthur with Excalibur. Yeah, Arthur matters, but the sword is It's own legend. It'll outlast him."
Can the Freehold help? "Probably. Or maybe it'll be worse for someone else. I dunno. I have a unique relationship with edges and cuts. It might matter.
Might not."
Jack:
Jack nods, and sets his now empty cup of tea on the bedside table. "Have you talked to the rest of DA about it, too? I said the Freehold 'cause...I mean there's no way for me to not be a 'representitive' -" Little charcoal air quotes drift from his form to accompany the word before dissolving, "but...you know." He shrugs. "I'm not your motley, and I'm not trying to replace them."
Vorpal:
"Oh. No. I mean I haven't talked to much of anyone about it really. I know how it sounds to be evincing hero worship vibes for a knife. I also know how it sounds to be worried about getting upstaged by a knife. I've been trying to puzzle out how best to proceed, and I haven't gotten very far. Or, more, I reach the intersection of "I don't know enough" and "But I'm pretty sure someone else could probably use it better" and then I get sad and plant my face in a pillow."
Jack:
"And you're worried that no one in DA is gonna understand all that? Even if you gotta say 'I don't know enough' and 'I'm pretty sure someone else could ust it better, and that makes me sad'?"
A beat pause.
"I will also say that me saying all this is hypocritical as fuck, I'm terrible at talking to the people I love about a lot of shit. But...mm." Another beat of silence, and Jack runs a hand thoughtfully through his hair.
"I don't think it sounds...worrisome, or...strange to worry about being upstaged by something like that. I make shit for a living, and folks don't usually see or know or care about what I do, because I'm literally upstaged by the show going on. It's...it sucks when things become bigger than you, when...the thing you did, you made, isn't attached to you anymore. Even if it wouldn't exist without you."
Vorpal:
"Huh? No, it isn't that I don't think they'll understand," Jackie says, trying to make sure she's understood properly. She doesn't mind being wrong, much less corrected, but she wants to make sure Jack has the right information to base his assessments off of. "I mean that I'm aware folx are always gonna be watching for those signs of unhealthy egotism, and I know that "this stupid knife feels more important than me" comes off like exactly that. Though it's really reassuring to know the baseline reaction isn't unreasonable.
The second part, too," she admits. "Is that... just a normal thing about being a creator?"
Jack:
Jack reaches out to put a hand on Jackie's ankle - or as near-to as he can figure out, given the shadows. Whatever part of the other Changeling is closest, and not weird for a metamour and friend to be offering physical contact through.
"It's one of the shittier parts about being a creator, honestly. I mostly get over it, but...I chose this career, and I know it's gonna happen a lot. It's...it's different, I'd think, if it's new. Harder to grapple with. Especially with the whole...concern about ego and unhealthy emotional shit. It...I dunno, I think also that at least you know how it could sound, and are...worried about it? You're...not making excuses for why it's not that, or something. I see a difference there."
Vorpal:
"I try to be real about stuff. I won't pretend I didn't used to be a madman who thought he was a God. That happened, and it's fair of folx to worry it might happen again. I'm stronger, now, not weaker, and the danger of suddenly finding one of the Lost Pantheon on your hands would be... considerable. Even allied, the low levels of clarity that viewpoint supports pretty much guarantee serious clarity syndromes on the regular,"
Jackie doesn't stop the touch, nor mind it, nodding as she listens, and sighing quietly. "I'd say I wish I'd never made the thing, but it'd be a lie. As much as I hate the implications it carries now, it saved someone- and... gods, if I ever find a way to share exactly what I saw, Jack, I'll show you what that Knife looks like when it cuts something."
Jack:
"That's more than a lot of people can be about their pasts," Jack points out with a smile. "But...I mean yeah, if you want to. I...am probably not the best person to appreciate that kinda shit, not gonna lie. I..." He trails off, and the charcoal that makes up his expression gets a little thin, a little wispy. "I know cutting doesn't mean violence, necessarily, but...me an' that don't mix, really. Or I...try not to, you know? But to help someone, like you did...I'd watch that in a second."
Vorpal:
"Nono, I'm explaining it wrong," muttered Vorpal, distraught. "It was something else, Jack, not at all because it was cutting, but WHEN it cut. It judt..just... became so much... more."
Jack:
There's a gentle squeeze on Vorpal's leg. "Did...anyone else who was with you - the person you cut free, or anyone, see what you saw? Wondering if...it's only the person who wields it who can see what it becomes in the moment...?" His voice is soft, still curious.
Vorpal:
V rests a hand over Jack's, thinking for a moment. "Sigrun. Artie. June. I don't know if they watched. Snowy too, maybe. Maybe it was just me. Maybe that was how it ripped at me. I dunno. There's too much I dunno. But... good to learn."
Jack:
"Might be good to find out what they saw, yeah. See if there's others to...I dunno if commiserate is the right word, but you know what I mean. Either way, you'll learn something about it, at least. I'm glad it didn't hurt you too badly, at least - have you used it again, since then?"
Vorpal:
"Corroborate. I think that's the word. Corroborate what I saw. And yeah. That's a good next step. Find out what's in my head and what isn't. Then figure out the best way to get this to the Helldivers that need it- and the best person to do so. I can't let my own hangups leave people leashed to Them.
I can't."
Jack:
Another squeeze to her leg, and Jack nods. "Sounds like a solid plan. Would eh...d'you want check-ins like this, about it? From me, or whoever, doesn't have to be me. But...someone else to talk through shit, as you figure it out."
Vorpal:
"Yeah. That's- that's a good idea. This is gonna take a while to sort, and... I mean, honestly, I could do worse than getting to know one of Teagan's absolutely most favorite people better." She squeezed lightly on Jack's hand beneath hers. "Plus I'm gonna be trying to do the whole extrasocietal diplomacy thing, so... someone who's had experience in that arena is all the more reason to meet up."
Jack:
Jack's cheeks get all scribbly with a blush when Teagan gets brought up, and he dips his head like he's mildly embarrassed. But only mildly, based on his smile.
"I'll do what I can. I like getting to know all of Teagan's other people, too. And yeah if you ever need backup for diplomacy shit hit me up, I...don't know when I became That Guy, but I am. And I don't hate it, even." He grins, and pushes away from the bed with a slight groan, leaving fluttering bits of charcoal in his wake. "I should probably get going, but I'll be around, yeah?"
Vorpal:
"Sounds like a plan. And yeah, you're at the top of my diplomacy tutor list, right next to Patchie herself. So- take care of yourself, okay? I'm not saying I'd be happy to cut my way into a loyalist hideout to get you to safety or something wild like that- but I'm not saying I wouldn't be happy, either~"
Jack:
"Don't say that sorta shit," Jack chastises with a laugh. "But yeah I'll do my best - no promises though." There's just the slightest touch of irony in his voice, at that.
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