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Tahmina Ashtifar has been a member of the local chapterhouse for a very long time, and she's afforded a good deal of respect for the number of Coils that she mastered before she gave up her studies. That she has a suite of rooms in the massive house that serves as their academy should be no surprise, nor should it be a surprise that the first room, the one that serves as her office, has a desk, but also a comfortable and more intimate seating area. Most of her official business is better suited to lounging and deep conversation, rather than formality.
It's at one of end of the couch that she's seated now, a book on her lap and her legs crossed. The door to the suite is open, as it almost always is when she's there and not seeing anyone already. She's rarely difficult to find or to reach out to when she's here, and that's by intention.
Floretta approaches the office at the chapter house, she's wearing a pale purple shirt which hangs off of one shoulder, a pair of dark blue jeans and casual black flats, a touch of make up to enhance her voice of features, mostly her eyes. She carries a purse with her. Her skin is warm with life, expression somewhat muted. Her other hand has a leash coiled around her arm, Herbert following in her steps. "Hi." she raise her hand in greeting.
Tahmina looks up when Floretta reaches her door, her face lights up with a smile, and then before she can even offer a greeting she spots the puppy and her eyes widen as she lets out a delighted squeal. "Oh my heart, look at that precious little fluffball," she says as she hurriedly sets her book aside and gets up. "I didn't realize you meant a puppy when you asked if you could bring your dog!" she exclaims as he all but leaps to her feet and hurries over, then restrains herself. "May I say hello?" she asks Floretta. "Are there any guidelines I should follow?"
The reaction from Tahmina draws an expression of surprise, at first, she's been very careful of how she handle him around other kindred after all, but ithe expression shifts just as fast toward joy at the reaction. "Of course you can say hello." she excitedly uncoil the leash from around her arm, giving the dog a little more freedom. "No real guideline, Herbert is meant to be a companion and maybe sort of an helper in my everyday life. I'd like him to be friendly."
"Wonderful!" Tahmina says as she approaches Herbert, then crouches down in front of him turned a bit sideways and holds out a hand. No leaning over him, or approaching head-on. "So precious," she tells him soothingly. "I just want to scoop you up and snuggle you." She looks up at Floretta from her crouch, a brilliant smile on her face. "Do you want to close the door? We can let him off the leash to wander around and explore in my office if you like."
"He loves to look around, but when I'm around other Kindred, I'm usually more careful, just in case they don't like it." Floretta does just that, shutting the door delicately and then leans down to free the puppy from the leash, which causes Herbert to likely sniff about the area curiously, although prudently as this is his first visit, he quickly return his attention to the woman crouching to meet him, sniffing at her hands curiously, standing on it's hindleg to sniff up at Tahmina's face. "It's been really great having him around." Floretta observe, smiling.
Tahmina gives copious affectionate skritchies to little Herbert as long as he's paying attention to her and not wandering off to investigate other things, and when he tries to get closer to her face she leans in so that he can give her kisses if he wants. It doesn't seem to bother her. "It's been a while since I had a dog," she laments. "I love them, but my heart has broken too many times. I can't do it again for a while.
There's a moment, a split second of confusion and understanding dawn quickly. Her smile dampens. "It's hard to lose a companion, It can't really get easier over the years." She seems enthralled at the sight of the head of a family playing with her companion. Herbert does offer a few kisses, before he starts to roam the area around both women, sniffing curiously. "Sledge got a pibble mix out of the same trip at the shelter, Eyrgjafa also got a cat, but I'm not sure it was for herself, she doesn't really bring it up much."
Tahmina nods her head sadly. When Herbert wanders off to satisfy his curiosity she stands and flicks her hand at some of the fur that got on her, but what doesn't come off easily she just accepts. "When you reach a certain age the time just flies past. You blink and the years go by," she laments. She smiles when Eyr gets mentioned. "She and I talked about cats just... a few weeks ago, I think it was? Interesting." She getures toward the couch. "Make yourself comfortable," she says as she goes to take her seat again.
Floretta takes a seat upon the couch, letting Herbert wanders into the office as he please, he seems to find comfort in the shadows beneath the desk. "I'm still within the normal human range and it feels that way sometimes. It's scary." she clear her throat. "Which... is a part of why I've been wanting to speak with you, specifically."
"I will note that it's a feeling that normal humans have, as they get older," Tahmina points out kindly. "That the time really starts to fly. It's just that continues to get more and more true for us. We're not so different, just more." She tilts her head in curiosity, so vibrantly human in her own interactions. For anyone who doesn't know better it's probably really difficult to believe she's an elder. "Why is that?"
"I feel like I'm a ticking timebomb. The fuse is still very long, mind you, but... I'm looking at the list of ingredients and I kind of can tell where this is going." Floretta says. "I don't like it, I don't like it one bit." she takes a deep breathe. Trying to stop herself from rambling.
Tahmina offers a sympathetic smile. "I see, yes." She shifts a little closer, but there's still enough space between them that she's not intruding on Floretta's personal bubble. "I think I can guess what's troubling you, but I don't want to put words in your mouth. What is it you're afraid of, exactly? Remember that I'm not here to judge you for the way you feel, or the fears you have. I'm here to help you not lose yourself to the Beast, or simply to apathy, or to anything else in the course of your research or your Requiem. Whatever you tell me stays in this room."
"My bloodline causes me to grow apart of humanity each time my blood grows stronger. I want to pursue studies in the Mysteries and my discipline, which can cause the blood to grow further." Floretta explains. "I'm 53 years old and my mom is not getting younger and she's pretty much my connection to anything resembling normalcy." She points to the little puff of brown fur visible to them from beneath the desk. "The paperwork aspect of growing old from a mortal point of view is worrying a little." she looks at her hands. "I already feel more distant, more dangerous and this isn't what I want. I refuse to just...slowly drift into being a monster just because I exist." Her gaze turn to Tahmina. "So I started looking for avenues of studies for it, I barely found anything." She doesn't speak the words but there is hope and curiosity there.
Tahmina listens and true to what she said, she doesn't seem to pass judgement on any of what Floretta's saying. "You're coming up to some difficult times in your continue existence," she agrees with sympathy. "I'm glad you're looking ahead at those things and thinking about how to brace yourself and prepare for them. A lot of us simply look away and pretend they're not coming until they've passed, and then struggled to come to terms with the way it makes them feel." There's a brief smile. "Most of the Ordo Dracul's studies don't focus on looking back at what we were, just forward at what we can become. How to be a better sort of monster, rather than how to avoid becoming one. I can see why you'd have trouble in your search."
Floretta nods and when her little observation comes in empty or rather, not entirely conclusive, she rubs her hand together, twisting, wringing them, hesitating before a plunge, before a question that oculd make things incredibly awkward. "I happen to specialize in the Great Works and mysteries we learn." She looks to Tahmina. "I found a mention of a title the academy apparently banned from use, I also think I found someone who stand Defiant of that." admiration? appreciation for her own play on word? there is a smile poking there. "Is that how you know most of the studies make us better monsters?" She doesn't even whisper the word, just mouth it. 'Absolution?'
Tahmina's expression remains calm and inviting through all of this, and she watches with patience as Floretta visibly struggles with how to proceed. The gentle, understanding smile she tends to wear doesn't disappear at any point, even in the few seconds of silence that hang in the air between them after Floretta's last question, when that word is being mouthed.
"You want to know if I've engaged in apostasy and studied things that academies all around the world have time and again decided should be forbidden as a betrayal of the advancement the Ordo Dracul was founded to pursue," she says in a soft, understanding tone. "And you're afraid that I'm going to kick you out of my office, or berate you, or turn you in for your interest. That simply speaking your heart's desire alone might result in your expulsion from this Academy, or even your final death." She lifts a slender hand and puts it over her heart, like she's making a pledge. "Floretta Williams, you can speak your mind without fear. You have my word that you'll face no repercussions from me for simply asking for my aid or pursuing your curiosity."
"Actually, I was worried you'd think that's what I was getting to." Floretta explains and seems rather relieved at the reaction there, almost to the point of tears. Almost. "I didn't want to risk putting you in danger by being open in a place where it wouldn't be safe. And I still don't know exactly what... that does." A curious, questioning air appears on her feature and in a flash it's gone. "Thank you." seems to be part of the passing epiphany.
"Don't you worry about me," Tahmina says with a small little handwave. "I can take care of myself, but I do appreciate your consideration. You're right that the title I've decided to proclaim openly carries with a suggestion of studies that aren't widely known, and based on the things you said earlier about your own concerns for yourself, I also suspect you have some idea what my studies were before I put them aside to help others. You also seem to be aware of some of the risk involved, but I still want to hear you say that you know that the danger of pursuing this line of inquiry could, at some point in the future, be the death of you. Not from me, mind you, but generally speaking."
That seems to bring something quite different in Floretta's gaze, fire and defiance, not in opposition, but in common with the Confessor. "I understand the dangers involved in pursuing these studies by virtue of my existence, I walk toward it with open eyes." she takes a deep breath again, it almost feel more natural than any of those she took during the conversation. "I felt a little inspired." She says, justifying the little dramatic, poetic flair.
"Good." Tahmina nods. Her head tilts slightly and she urges, "why don't you tell me what you know, or hypothesize, already. We can start this discussion from there."
"My hypothesis regarding this particular study is that it relates to humanity in some way." A beat. "I suspect it relates to the Banes Kindred acquire over time, maybe connect us to a particular person in stronger fashion? Sort of like a stronger anchor?"
Tahmina's smile suggests Floretta might be in the right general area at least even though she says, "it sounds like you're not very certain, but that's okay. The 'Absolution' in my title indicates that I've studied what's called the Coil of Ziva. Is the name Ziva familiar to you?" A Slavic fertility goddess. It's not a particularly obscure reference, but there's no real reason to associate it with the Ordo Dracul.
"I am not certain, I know it has to relate to something the Ordo wouldn't like in the grand scheme of things, so likely retaining humanity and suppressing part of our nature as Kindred." Floretta explains her thoughts. "Which is why I brought Banes and something akin to the connections we keep to remind ourselves." A look toward Herbert. "And I've heard of the name, Ziva. Something about a Fertility Goddess?"
"Yes," Tahmina answers with a nod. "You're pretty close when it comes to what I know of the changes the Coil of Ziva lets us bring about, too. I've only mastered the first two stages, and what I know about the rest is hearsay since the one who was teaching me is dead." She takes a deep breath, leans back, and lets the breath back out. "The first stage helps us to resist many of our own banes. For me, as a Daeva, the most important fact has been my ability to feed on the same person more than once without losing myself to obsession over them. It doesn't help in dealing with fire or sunlight, though."
"I got fire and sunlight covered." Floretta nods "It's helpful in maintaining a facade of humanity, but not the real thing." She explains summarily, just in case it's helpful. "it helps with Clan banes!?" She exclaim in an excited whisper. that seems to be enough to thrill her. "Would it help with Bloodline banes as well?" She's immediately curious for more, enthusiastic.
That question actually gives Tahmina pause, the one about bloodlines. "I genuinely don't know," she admits. "My bloodline's is a bit more esoteric than most of them, and it can be hard to pin down exactly what it does to us. I'm not actually certain if mine has been impacted by learning the Coil." She looks distant for a moment before fixing Floretta with an energized look. "I suppose that if you can understand the impact of your own bloodline's bane well, this is an answer we can find through experimentation."
"Well, sound like I have a potential first goal to reach." Floretta smiles and nods. "More importantly, what is the starting point?" she leans back a little bit in the couch.
"It's traditional to ask for something in return for instruction," Tahmina answers, then she pauses to consider something. "There's another person in the local academy who has asked me for instruction in the Coil of Ziva. It might make the situation easier for all of us if you're willing to engage in your study together, instead of separately. It's not the request I'd make in exchange for teaching you, but are you willing to grant me permission to tell them you're pursuing this line of study as well?"
Floretta does not seems surprised by the exchange of service required. "I give you permission to tell them. Safer together." She never was the kind of student to balk at working with others, not even in Unlife. "Do you know what you wish to request from me already or do you need time to find a suitable one?" She offers with a smile
"I have an idea, but I want to talk to your counterpart and make sure they agree to joint studies first," Tahmina answers as she glances around, spots the dog, and smiles delightedly. "I'll check with them and get back to you soon," she tells Floretta. "I can give you some reading material to start with as well."
Floretta nods and makes a smile. "I'll dive into the readings as soon as I can find time for them." Which lets face it is likely to be ten minutes after getting them. "How secretive do you want us to be about it? Who's safe to tell?" Important, yet unfortunately familiar questions
"That's up to you," Tahmina answers with a smile. "I put directly into my titles the fact that I know something that most people don't. In my case I hang it out as a sign for other people who might be pursuing what I view as a valuable, worthy line of study. I'm taking a risk, but I'm not asking anyone else to do the same." She gestures at her office. "Obviously, in present day Philadelphia that risk isn't so great. We never know when that might change."
"I am familiar with that particular arrangement of life." Floretta plucks her phone from pockets, the trans-flag case on display there. "About the same reason I keep these flags and colors about." she tilt her head, pondering. "I'll need time to debate what I'll do internally, and probably with whoever else is joining the studies."
Tahmina lets out a delighted laugh. "Much like that, yes," she says, seemingly grasping the implications of the phone case without trouble, despite her age. She gets up from the couch and goes over to the bookshelf in the office, where she scans the spines for a moment. "Where did I..." she starts musing. "Oh. Actually, I think it's at my house. I'll have to remember to bring that book back here..."
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