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Lux and Mearcstapa and Jack went off to dance before heading off their separate way from the other two. Fox? Fox drank and danced and watched people and now... they're ready to go. She slips up alongside Anthelion, passing her back the credit card, and offers quietly, "I paid the tab."
"I'm -- gonna go. You can come with me if you want. I don't know where I'm going yet."
"I'd like that - I'd like to go with you." Anthelion tucks her card back into the side pouch on her purse, slinging it over the shoulder that Fox isn't currently beside. "Just," she gestures down at her heeled boots. "Please don't make me run in these shoes. It won't be pretty, I can assure you of that." Beat. "Other than how we get there, I don't care where we go."(edited)
"Then take me somewhere where we can talk and I can drink water, because I don't really ... I mean I could just not have a hangover but ... " Fox's voice trails off, and she grabs on to the straps of her backpack with both hands as if to still her fussing. "I'm not gonna make you run. Probably I'm gonna make you call us a Lyft." Absently, they chew on his lower lip.
"I can do that," her phone's already out - and the app is already open. Leta only had one drink - it's a rule she has - so she's barely tipsy at this point. What can I say, HRT wrecks your tolerance and the beverage was a little heavy in the Russian. "Our driver should be here in under a minute - then we'll go back to my apartment, and we can chase your hangover away with a stick." Zzzzip. The phone disappears back into her handbag, and she peers at Fox, watching their expressions.(edited)
One eyebrow rises, then, and Fox, who has had three drinks and not bothered with her tolerance, hums a little bit under her breath. "With a stick?" she asks, and it looks for a minute like she might make a bawdy joke, but he doesn't. Not at the moment. "Well, we can definitely do that, if you want." Tugging on the straps of their backpack, Fox chews their lower lip and pads for the door.
"It was an expression, but I'm not opposed" Leta shakes her head in amusement, following after Fox - stepping outside behind them and into the relatively cool night. "I feel naked without my laptop bag," she shifts a mostly-chewed toothpick over to the other side of her mouth. "Those three seemed very happy, though, didn't they? I'm surprised - before now, I couldn't have imagined Mearcstapa at a club like that."(edited)
She looks back over her shoulder at Leta and stops on the street, looking up and down the pavement as she waits for the car to arrive. A breeze rolls up the street and ruffles her black hair, and she rocks on her feet absently. "Well, I mean, if it's just an expression that's okay, too," Fox replies, looking for the car. "They do, yeah! I mean, they had some struggles recently, but... " A pause. "Why not?"
"It is and it isn't," Leta shrugs - and then she shivers when the wind shifts. The low 70's are actually a bit cool for her. "It wasn't an intentional innuendo because you seem a little worried, and off-balance. I didn't want to be inappropriate." There's a moment's pause. "Well, he seems so straight laced at work - like me, I suppose." Beat. "... and I probably wouldn't have gone out to one, either, if I hadn't been going with you."(edited)
Normally, this is where Fox would just fling her arms around Leta and lend their body heat until the car arrives. But he is off-balance, and a little worried, so that doesn't happen. "That's fair," Fox answers, absently rubbing at their cheek with one hand. "I, um. You got upset, or seemed upset, that I would be living with Zoya and Vasha." Her forehead wrinkles up, then. "Almost like -- an accusation. Or. Jealous. I dunno." She chews her lower lip again, and when the Lyft starts to pull up, she adds, "Well, I mean, I'm glad you came with me, then, so you could see him? I guess some people are different at work."
"Jealous is... not correct - though, I think an accusation would be an accurate read. Even if that wasn't my intention," Leta offers quietly on the way over to the car. She doesn't elaborate further, though - unless Fox prods - and (after checking her phone to make sure this was the correct vehicle) she climbs into the back seat before sidling over to the other side so Fox can follow her in. "That's fair. I don't think I'm very different when I'm at work - which is probably why it was so surprising to see him in that setting. I assumed he and I were more the same than not - in that regard."(edited)
Fox unslings her backpack from one arm but keeps the other through the strap, pulling her backpack onto her lap. He glances aside at Leta, then, watching her thoughtfully. There's a driver, though, and so Fox falls into that awkward silence that happens in the back of a Lyft when people don't want to give the driver fuel for his social media posts later but also are in the middle of a conversation.
It isn't until they get to their destination and Fox climbs out of the car that they ask: "What do you mean, an accusation would be an accurate read?" It's late, so he keeps her voice low, while being still loud enough to be heard.
"I told you when we first started speaking that I was trying to pin down an accurate read on what makes Fox," Leta heads in through the parking garage entrance - her apartment is pretty ritzy. "I was confused by the statement, because the picture I'd built in my head didn't seem congruent with it." Beat. "... and I know that's probably silly. When you're presented with evidence that contradicts a theory, you test it - and then adapt, or correct your theory accordingly." She presses the button on the elevator, and thankfully it's already at the bottom floor, so it opens immediately. "... and it took me a moment to get there."(edited)
She listens, and ducks her head forward, her face curtained by her black hair. "You were confused by the idea that ... " and once they're in the elevator and the door closes, the woman who had previously had no problem 'joking' about rolling someone like an alligator in a club continues, "... that I would live with my cadre?" Fox pauses, adding, "We haven't actually talked about whatever we are. Which didn't bother me until I felt like you thought I had done something wrong by -- moving in with Zoya and Vasha."
"Oh, wait." She holds up a hand to interrupt - or perhaps to dispel. "No, it's-" Leta frowns. "I'm well aware that we haven't defined... whatever this is that we have. I'm not looking at the situation in terms of one or the other." Beat. "The thing that's incongruent is... that you don't generally seem interested in being tied to places. Or to things, either. The idea that-" She makes a small, frustrated noise - puffing her cheeks as she exhales. "I don't know how to phrase it - and I'm feeling rather inept."
As the elevator door opens to the fourth floor, she falls quiet - starting down the hall, and stopping to fiddle with the keys outside her apartment door. The door comes open, and she lets Fox inside first. "Regardless of whether or not I can articulate the other point, am not upset about you moving in with your cadre -- and I'm sorry if my actions implied that."
She hangs her purse on a hook by the dior, and steps off into her bedroom - so she can shed her restrictive work clothes.(edited)
She steps in, and then steps to the side of the door; by stepping on the backs of her shoes one after the other, she shucks them off, and then wanders over to the couch so that he can flop down on it. While Leta changes, Fox takes out their phone and fiddles with it. "You were surprised by the fact that I was happy about having a home with my cadre, because I don't strike you as someone who is tied to things, places." A pause as she taps at her phone's screen, her voice raised loud enough to carry. "What I'm tied to are the people. Having a home with my cadre makes me happy because it means I am home again. жар-птица are my home, whether we're in a tent on the banks of the Susquehanna, eating dinner on the banks of the Neva, or in a penthouse in Center City."
"I missed them desperately. Both of them. I miss Pleroma, still, though I'm happy that she's happy where she is." She puffs out her cheeks. "Trees need roots. My roots are anchored in their hearts."
"Yes," Leta confirms - leaning out past the doorframe. Her maroon blouse is partially unbuttoned, and a black lace bra is visible. Only for a moment, though, and she ducks back. "Which means I need to reexamine the lens through which I was viewing our... relationship?" Fox can hear drawers opening and closing, jewelry being placed onto a bedside table, and maybe even the soft fmpf of clothes being tossed into a hamper. "Based on my read, I assumed this would probably be casual, it probably wouldn't last long, and I would be fine with that, because it has been - and would probably continue to be - fun." Beat. "...and then there would be new experiences."
There's a pause, and Fox can probably also hear Leta drop onto the bed. "Hmmm."(edited)
The Thyrsus goes quiet for a while, listening to the movement, and idly tapping at her phone screen. Texting someone, probably. Maybe Vasha, maybe Lux, maybe just arguing with someone on Facebook. Who the fuck knows, really. Only Fox, and whoever he's messaging. They listen to all the rustling, and, phone in hand, get up to wander around the room. A little closer to the bedroom door, maybe, but leaving Leta her privacy. "I don't know what 'Hmm' means in this context."
"I don't know either," she drops back wards onto the mattress. If Fox peaks, they'll see she's still mostly dressed. Bra still on. Hose still on. Skirt still on. Her legs are dangling over the side of the bed, and her arms have been draped on either side of her head as she looks at the ceiling. "... and I don't really like having this conversation." Beat. "Maybe I am jealous - or maybe I just let my narrow interpretation of what was going on dictate the parameters of what I wanted. New information confronts that, and now I feel like I need to make up for lost ground." She clears her throat. "Me needing to walk through this entire thing is probably very frustrating, and I'm sorry."(edited)
Eventually she does peek, and ends up leaning against the doorframe. Phone in hand, looking in to the room. "Look, Leta, if all you want is for us to be a fun time that doesn't go any further than 'Fox likes to tie people up and Leta likes to be tied up and Fox is an experience junkie and so is Leta,' it doesn't have to. If you do want it to go further than that, I'm -- really not averse to that." Fox taps her phone in its leather case against his thigh. "That said... Vasha is my heart. My anchor. We've been together for more than a decade."
"I recognize it might be very unfair to you to tell you 'there's a first place in my heart, and it's taken, but there's an awful lot of room for lots of second places,' but that's how it is."
Leta is quiet for a very long time, staring at the ceiling fan as it spins overhead. Eventually her gaze drops to Fox for a moment, and her brow furrows peering at the little Thyrsus. "There's a water filter in the fridge, by the way. Cups in the cabinet above it." Then her eyes turn back to the fan. Probably that wasn't all she had to say on the subject - but it seems to be the only thing she's managed to effectively smash into words. She goes back to silence for a few moments more.
"I don't really care about first and second, but I have no desire to be someone else's fleeting experience," she says this regardless of whether or not Fox is still in the doorway - and loud enough to be heard if they aren't. "I've been that for enough people, and what I want is to linger. I want to be the kind of person that you excitedly talk about to other people when I'm not around - and to be the reason your expression brightens when I am."
There's another pause. "Whether or not the "you" in question is Fox is something else to be discussed, but. That's where I'm at." Beat. "I do not settle for being a footnote in anything that I do."(edited)
At mention of the water filter, Fox looks over her shoulder and then makes a subtle 'pffft' sound, blowing air out absently. Who goes to get water when they can just fiddle with their own metabolism to process out the alcohol and prevent themself from getting a headache at the same time? She brings a hand up to the carved necklace she always wears, the fox/wolf/moon thing with the sapphire eye, and High Speech is her first answer, clear and pretty and strange. Her Nimbus flares: petrichor, the scent of fresh-cut grass, and the feeling that a person gets when looking into the eyes of a faithful canid companion.
Clearly it's more important for Fox to stay here than to go have a drink of water, and Life Magic enables them to be both sober and not dehydrated, at least for a moment.
Then there's a good long silence, in which lots of things can go. Lots of thoughts. She leans against the door frame, idly tapping her phone against her thigh. "I don't know what happens tomorrow," Fox answers. "I know that I like you. I know that I enjoy spending time with you. I know I have plans to go do drugs with you in a fucking AirBnB in Doylestown. Like, I have no... intention... of stopping any of that."
"No one wants you to be a fucking footnote, Leta."
She pulls herself up, all fluid, and boneless as she ends up in a sitting position - looking directly at Fox with that piercing gaze of hers. She breathes deeply from the scent of Fox's nimbus - never taking her eyes off of the Thyrsus.
"Neither do I," she offers eventually. "I could, I think, if I cared to know, but I'd much rather figure that out on my own without spoilers." Beat. "I like you and I enjoy spending a time with you - and I don't think you want me to be a footnote."
She stands up from the bed, proceeding to fetch the clothes she's set aside - an ancient Velvet Underground t-shirt, and pajama pants - before continuing to strip and change into the more comfortable clothes without giving a single shit about the fact that she's having a conversation. Oh come on, it's not like Fox hasn't seen it all before anyway. "... but I do think that I let myself be convinced that I was satisfied - and now, I have discovered that I wasn't." Beat. "And I am incredibly fucking tired now that everything has dawned on me."(edited)
The little Thyrsus lets out a puff of breath, and offers Leta a much more relaxed little smile, all her seriousness sort of melting away, back into the much more chill creature that Fox normally is. "Too many spoilers make life rotten," she shrugs, and then absently gnaws her lower lip again. She doesn't go anywhere, because this talk has become, like, Serious Business.
"I may disappear, I may wander back in. There's a reason why my cadre has always called me the 'Very Farseeker.' I go find trouble and I sometimes bring it home." Fox doesn't look away, because, like, okay, it's a serious conversation, but also, that's Leta's ... everything. And she likes it. Clearly. "I'm gonna go get some water, and I'm gonna text Vasha and let him know I'll be back later, so he doesn't worry. And then I'm going to steal one of your t-shirts and we'll snuggle. And probably sleep."
And maybe there's sleep immediately, and maybe not. But sooner or later, one small Thyrsus and one gangly Mastigos end up a tangle of snuggle.
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